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It is better for young to get advice from older people than young people. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

It is better for young to get advice from older people than young people. v. 3
People diverge significantly on their opinions, whether youths should seek guidance from their peers or from their seniors. From my perspective, I believe seniors guidance and advice is preferred due to their immense wisdom and maturity in life. The following essay will illustrate my reasons further. Firstly, it is well known that older people have much extensive experience compared to the younger generation as they have been through many successes, failures and obstacles which shaped their vision to life challenges. Younger people do not acquire such knowledge. For example, a mother who has seen the long term effects of unplanned pregnancies on the victim women will warn her high school daughter against trying sex during these critical years if she comes to her for instruction, in contrast to a school friend who will push her to try it driven by her excitement to try new things without considering the consequences. Secondly, from a medical point of view, physiologically, our bodies go through certain phases of developments. During these phases our hormones including sex hormones which are responsible for taking risky behaviour change significantly. This is particularly important to mention as these hormones are at their peak during adolescent years. To illuminate this point, think of a young man who needs an advice about high speed driving or trying a risky sport, will his father or monitor encourage him to do so. In conclusion, The source of advice is of utmost importance when it is needed by young generation who lack sufficient knowledge and experience. I believe that parents will always be the best source of guidance due to their sharpen skills and vast wisdom.
People
diverge
significantly
on their opinions, whether youths should seek guidance from their peers or from their seniors. From my perspective, I believe seniors guidance and advice
is preferred
due to their immense wisdom and maturity in life. The following essay will illustrate my reasons
further
.

Firstly
, it is well known that older
people
have much extensive experience compared to the younger generation as they have been through
many
successes, failures and obstacles which shaped their vision to life challenges. Younger
people
do not acquire such knowledge.
For example
, a mother
who
has
seen
the long term effects of unplanned pregnancies on the victim women will warn her high school daughter against trying sex during these critical years if she
comes
to her for instruction,
in contrast
to a school friend
who
will push her to try it driven by her excitement to try new things without considering the consequences.

Secondly
, from a medical point of view,
physiologically
, our bodies go through certain phases of developments. During these phases our hormones including sex hormones which are responsible for taking risky
behaviour
change
significantly
. This is
particularly
important
to mention as these hormones are at their peak during adolescent years. To illuminate this point,
think
of a young
man
who
needs
an advice
about high speed driving or trying a risky sport, will his father or monitor encourage him to do
so
.

In conclusion
, The source of advice is of utmost importance when it
is needed
by young generation
who
lack sufficient knowledge and experience. I believe that parents will always be the best source of guidance due to their sharpen
skills
and vast wisdom.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay It is better for young to get advice from older people than young people. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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