Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to develop your Speaking. v.4

It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Use specific reasons and examples to develop your Speaking. v. 4
In recent decades, environmental pollution has been receiving a great deal of media attention around the world due to its substantial impacts on our life. The essay will point out several causes leading to water contamination as well as negative consequences on human society and wildlife. There are different ways, resulting in the pollution of rain. Firstly, it is clear that a myriad of factories and enterprises nowadays are discharging untreated wastes into the sea and river. For example, Anaconda Aluminium in Montana produced manufacturing wastes that contaminated local drink sources with lead and chromium. Secondly, educating about rain pollution has not been disseminated to the general public and some community in the world. For example, in many remote areas in Vietnam such as a Lao CAI province, Ha Giang province, many people do not have opportunity access to education and thus they are unaware of their activities affecting negatively to drink environment or what can be done to protect it. There are several results of rain contamination impacting on human life and wildlife. First, a variety of species will be in danger due to the lack of fresh drink. As a result, this causes to the food chain disruption and a decline in the number of animals or even extinction of aquatic creature species. Second, human can suffer from a risk of some life-threatening diseases as they drink and live with toxic water. In fact, there are a myriad of people in the world died every year because of using polluted water. In conclusion, waste discharged by factories and awareness of society are two main factors causing to water pollution. These effects mentioned above has some serious impacs on both human society and animal life
In recent decades, environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
has been receiving a great deal of media attention around the world due to its substantial impacts on our life. The essay will point out several causes leading to water contamination
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
society and wildlife.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways, resulting in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
of rain.
Firstly
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that a myriad of factories and enterprises nowadays are discharging untreated wastes into the sea and river.
For example
, Anaconda
Possible spelling mistake. 'Aluminium' is British English.
Aluminium
in Montana produced manufacturing wastes that contaminated local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
sources with lead and chromium.
Secondly
, educating about rain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
has not
been disseminated
to the
Consider using "public".
general public
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
community in the world.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
remote areas in Vietnam such as a Lao CAI province, Ha
Possible spelling mistake found.
Giang
province,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not have opportunity access to education and
thus
they are unaware of their activities affecting
negatively
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
environment or what can
be done
to protect it.

There are several results of rain contamination impacting on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
life and wildlife.
First
, a variety of species will be in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
due to the lack of fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
.
As a result
, this causes to the food chain disruption and a decline in the number of animals or even extinction of aquatic creature species. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
can suffer from a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
life-threatening diseases as they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drink
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with toxic water. In fact, there are a
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "myriads"?
myriad
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
every year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of using polluted water.

In conclusion
, waste discharged by factories and awareness of society are two main factors causing
Did you mean "watering"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. These effects mentioned above has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious
Possible spelling mistake found.
impacs
on both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
society and animal
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
life
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Use specific reasons and examples to develop your Speaking. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts