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it has been said that: not everything that is learned is contained in book. compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from book. In your opinion, which source is more important? why? v.1

it has been said that: not everything that is learned is contained in book. compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from book. In your opinion, which source is more important? why? v. 1
Learning has several meanings and there are lots of ways which we can gain knowledge and learn. Nowadays we have so many resources in order to obtain information. In my point of view, books and experiments are the most important sources. personally, I believe that books and treatises have vital role in our lives to become more knowledgeable. I would like to illustrate my reasons as follows. First of all, books give us comperhensive information as a trustful friend in a short time. By reading book we can gain knowledge in various majors and subjects in very short time, in comparison with experience. You can just go to library and find appropriate books instead of waiting to experience a special occasion. My own experience is a compelling example of this. I remember about two years ago, there was an amazing chance for me to have an incredibly long vacation. I was delighted and stuned ands I decided to make so much effort so a s to find a romantic destination for my trip. Consequently, I searched in the internet and found a fantastic book which was contained comprehensive information about countries all over the world. This book included all beneficial points like weather, culture, special foods, historical places and etc. in addition, if I wanted to get this information by experience I would have to spend days or weeks and it was so time consuming. Besides, we can be aware of every details and aspects of our subject by reading books. In my opinion, the best advantageous of book is that it gives the details for free or less expensive than gain experience. If people want to experience all the situations and places they should pay lots of money. To be more specific, get knowledge by experience it definitely lead to spend much money and even miss your chances. For instance, I used to invest in some project to make profit when I was younger. At first I thought that I should emphasize on my own assumptions and experiments in different occasions. As a result, it was not much helpful and I could not successful in this way. However, I decided to get a useful book which described hazardous and risky situation that any investor could face with in his career. By studying some books, my point of view has changed and I could make some fabulous investment. Actually, those books taught me lots of patterns that made my project defensible and I could predict the fluctuations in rates. Despite these advantages, researches and experiments has proved that, the knowledge that is gained from experiments is very likely to be retain in our memory for a long period of time. For example, most of people believe that the experience they have gained remain with their own as long as they live. In fact, they prefer to manipulate knowledge and use experience rather than only possess knowledge. In conclusion, I prefer to get information and obtain knowledge by reading and studying useful books, because, this attitude makes me to get knowledgeable faster, easier and less expensive.
Learning has several meanings and there are lots of ways which we can gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and learn. Nowadays we have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
resources in order to obtain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiments
are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
sources.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
personally
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and treatises have vital role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to become more knowledgeable. I would like to illustrate my reasons as follows.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
give us
Possible spelling mistake found.
comperhensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
as a trustful friend in a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. By reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
we can gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in various majors and subjects in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
in comparison
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
. You can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
go to library and find appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
instead
of waiting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
a special occasion. My
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
is a compelling example of this. I remember about two years ago, there was an amazing chance for me to have an
incredibly
long vacation. I
was delighted
and
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "stunned", the past tense form of the verb 'stun'?
stuned
Possible spelling mistake found.
ands
I decided to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much effort
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
s to find a romantic destination for my trip.
Consequently
, I searched
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the internet".
in the internet
and found a fantastic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
which
was contained
comprehensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about countries all over the world. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
included all beneficial points like weather, culture, special foods, historical places
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
.
in addition
, if I wanted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
I would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend days or weeks and it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
.

Besides
, we can be aware of every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "detail"?
details
and aspects of our subject by reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. In my opinion, the best advantageous of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
is that it gives the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
for free or less expensive than gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
all the situations and places they should pay lots of money. To be more specific,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
it definitely
Did you mean "leads"?
lead
to spend much money and even miss your chances.
For instance
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to invest in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
project to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
profit when I was younger. At
The comma is probably missing here: "first, I".
first I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that I should emphasize on my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
assumptions and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiments
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
occasions.
As a result
, it was not much helpful and I
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
could not successful
in this way.
However
, I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
hazardous and risky situation that any investor could face with in his career. By studying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, my point of view has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
and I could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fabulous investment. Actually, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
taught me lots of patterns that made my project defensible and I could predict the fluctuations in rates.

Despite these advantages, researches and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiments
has proved that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
that
is gained
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiments
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
likely to be
Consider using a past participle here: "retained".
retain
in our memory for a long period of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For example
, most of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
they have gained remain with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
as long as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. In fact, they prefer to manipulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
possess knowledge.

In conclusion
, I prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and obtain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
by reading and studying useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, this attitude
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledgeable faster, easier and less expensive.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Mistakes

IELTS essay it has been said that: not everything that is learned is contained in book. compare and contrast knowledge gained from experience with knowledge gained from book. In your opinion, which source is more important? why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
515 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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