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International travel brings benefits to travelers and countries visited, but it also causes problems for the environment. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages? Give your own opinion and relevant examples. v.2

International travel brings benefits to travelers and countries visited, but it also causes problems for the environment. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages? Give your own opinion and relevant examples. v. 2
International travel is trending all over since quite some time now, because of more awareness about travel destinations and cheap travel options. However, excessive tourist numbers have been known to wreck the natural beauty of these tourist destinations, proving that international tourism is more harmful to the environment. The first reason why I say this is because when tourists go to a place of natural beauty, let’s say Mauritius, they flock to its beautiful beaches, for which the country is famous. However, there have been cases of littering observed by many tourists day by day, due to eating out or while driving around, and this makes keeping the beach and surrounding areas clean, more difficult. I believe this happens because the tourists have no sense of belonging to that place since it’s not their homeland. Apart from this, they take it for granted that famous holiday destinations are obviously being maintained by the government, so even if they spoil it, it will be taken care of by the authorities. A second reason to support my view is that if tourist spots are visited a lot, the natural solitude of the place gets disturbed. An example to support this statement is the cable car facilities in the Swiss Alps region. Before tourists might have started swarming the Alps, there would have been no noises and constructions that obstruct the natural landscape pattern. But after the place got popular, the authorities had to build a ropeway system for tourist activities. The frequent noise of the tourists and skiing and mountain climbing disturbed the peace of the area, enabling the natural wildlife to stay away from there and seek shelters elsewhere. Citing the above mentions examples I would conclude by saying that as more and more tourists explore the holiday destinations, the natural habitat of these places gets altered to accommodate more people. Seeing that international travel is growing day by day, it is definitely causing more harm to the environment.
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
is trending all over since quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of more awareness about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destinations
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
options.
However
, excessive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
numbers have
been known
to wreck the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
beauty of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destinations
, proving that international tourism is more harmful to the environment.

The
first
reason why I say this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
go to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
beauty,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
’s say Mauritius, they flock to its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
beaches, for which the country is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
.
However
, there have been cases of littering observed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "tourists'" or "tourist's"?
tourists
day by day, due to eating out or while driving around, and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
keeping the beach and surrounding areas clean, more difficult. I believe this happens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
have no sense of belonging to that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
since it’s not their homeland. Apart from this, they take it for granted that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
holiday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destinations
are
obviously
being maintained
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
even if they spoil it, it will
be taken
care of by the authorities.

A second reason to support my view is that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
spots
are visited
a lot, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
solitude of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
disturbed. An example to support this statement is the cable car facilities in the Swiss Alps region.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
might have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
swarming the Alps, there would have been no noises and constructions that obstruct the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
landscape pattern.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
popular, the authorities had to build a
Possible spelling mistake found.
ropeway
system for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
activities. The frequent noise of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
and skiing and mountain climbing disturbed the peace of the area, enabling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
wildlife to stay away from there and seek shelters elsewhere.

Citing the above mentions examples I would conclude by saying that as more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
explore the holiday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
destinations
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
habitat of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
altered to accommodate more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Seeing that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
is growing day by day, it is definitely causing more harm to the environment.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay International travel brings benefits to travelers and countries visited, but it also causes problems for the environment. Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages? Give your own opinion and relevant examples. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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