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International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages? v. 1
A lot of countries have benefitted through global tourism, but along with that, there is a worry that it could harm the locals and the surroundings. This essay strongly agrees that the drawbacks of worldwide tourism outweigh the advantages because it results in loss of local culture and increases pollution which harms both the natives and the environment. Tourists have caused a steady decline in the cultural identity of a place. Every country has a unique and rich culture and the large-scale intermixing of people from across the globe has decreased the cultural value of a place. This is because locals are often fascinated with cultures that are different from their own. They start adapting to the social customs and practices of foreigners and this results in the loss of their own methods. For example, in Bali, English is taking precedence over native languages, so that the natives can communicate better with tourists. This is slowly causing their local language to phase out. Additionally, mass tourism has increased pollution levels significantly and this is giving way to serious health hazards. Some countries invest heavily in aerial events such as fireworks and their elaborate displays have become one of the topmost attractions of the place. To retain their attractiveness, countries continue to host such events year after year. Not only does this lead to poor air quality, but is also known to cause various lung and respiratory diseases. For instance, in China, years and years of fireworks have resulted in smog and inflammatory diseases among their people. In conclusion, this essay agrees with the opinion that international tourism is harmful rather than beneficial because it has brought down the local culture and adversely affected the environment and its people.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefitted
through global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
along with that, there is a worry that it could harm the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
and the surroundings. This essay
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that the drawbacks of worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
outweigh the advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it results in loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and increases pollution which harms both the natives and the environment.

Tourists have caused a steady decline in the cultural identity of a place. Every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has a unique and rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and the large-scale intermixing of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from across the globe has decreased the cultural value of a place. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
fascinated with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
that are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
adapting to the social customs and practices of foreigners and this results in the loss of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
methods.
For example
, in Bali, English is taking precedence over native languages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the natives can communicate better with tourists. This is
slowly
causing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
language to phase out.

Additionally
, mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has increased pollution levels
significantly
and this is giving way to serious health hazards.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
invest
heavily
in aerial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
such as fireworks and their elaborate displays have become one of the topmost attractions of the place. To retain their attractiveness,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
continue to host such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
does this lead to poor air quality,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
is
also
known to cause various lung and respiratory diseases.
For instance
, in China, years and years of fireworks have resulted in smog and inflammatory diseases among their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
, this essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with the opinion that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is harmful
rather
than beneficial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has brought down the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the environment and its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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