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International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. What is your opinion about this issue? v.6

International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. What is your opinion about this issue? v. 6
International tourism has achieved a remarkable growth over the last few decades. Although the growing arrival of visitors is beneficial to the host countries to some extents, the demerits of the international travel outshine due to the adverse impacts on environmental and national culture. The development of international tourism is a complicated issue with more than one consequence. The most significant effect is on pollution. Particularly, Vehicles carrying foreign tourists such as airplanes, cars and trains discharge tons of greenhouse gas into the air on a daily basis, doing severe damage to the atmosphere. Moreover, visitors are likely to release a huge amount of waste wherever they go. Another detrimental effect is the loss of national identity and traditional values when culture is exploited for tourism purposes. To be more specific, tourism might lead to the assimilation of cultures when minority groups may abandon their own culture to adopt the more dominant ones. For example, Hmong, an ethnics group in Vietnam, was famous for their soothing yet funky music with ethereal melody by their unique handmade instruments. However, because of the booming international travel, they are now under the influence of thumping music through MP3, hence, only a small number of Hmong people can embrace their tradition. A number of drastic measures should be taken to address the problem. The way forward might be to restrict visitor numbers to some national heritages to reserve their natural charms. Another solution to tackle the problem is that the governments should underline the importance of historical attractions and positive tourism, thus, people will become conscious of protecting the environment and heritages. In conclusion, this essay has highlighted two major negative impacts of international tourism to the environment and the host countries’ cultures. Everybody should take action to mitigate the devastating effects of this phenomenon.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
has achieved a remarkable growth over the last few decades. Although the growing arrival of visitors is beneficial to the host countries to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extents, the demerits of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
travel outshine due to the adverse impacts on environmental and national culture.

The development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is a complicated issue with more than one consequence. The most significant effect is on pollution.
Particularly
, Vehicles carrying foreign tourists such as airplanes, cars and trains discharge tons of greenhouse gas into the air on a daily basis, doing severe damage to the atmosphere.
Moreover
, visitors are likely to release a huge amount of waste wherever they go.

Another detrimental effect is the loss of national identity and traditional values when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is exploited
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
purposes. To be more specific,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
might lead to the assimilation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
when minority groups may abandon their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
to adopt the more dominant ones.
For example
, Hmong, an ethnics group in Vietnam, was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
for their soothing
yet
funky music with ethereal melody by their unique handmade instruments.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the booming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
travel, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
under the influence of thumping music through MP3,
hence
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number of Hmong
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can embrace their tradition.

A number of drastic measures should
be taken
to address the problem. The way forward might be to restrict visitor numbers to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
national heritages to reserve their natural charms. Another solution to tackle the problem is that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should underline the importance of historical attractions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
,
thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will become conscious of protecting the environment and heritages.

In conclusion
, this essay has highlighted two major
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
to the environment and the host countries’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
. Everybody should take action to mitigate the devastating effects of this phenomenon.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. What is your opinion about this issue? v. 6

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
301 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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