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Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages? v.10

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. v. 10
Enthusiasm for information technology among human beings is increasing rapidly. It is being utilized almost everywhere, such as in our homes, during leisure time and at work places. This approach towards technology has enormous benefits despite some disadvantages which are written in the following paragraphs. To begin with, with the advancement in technology, it is being used throughout the world in every field of life. As it is being used vastly in the telecommunication sector, it has brought everyone closer to each other. Moreover, nowadays, schools, colleges, universities, and even privileged businesses across the world are embracing this advancement and do trading with ease. For instance, with the help of internet, one can interact with anyone from the world with face-to-face video conferencing tool. Furthermore, researchers have developed techniques to generate artificial intelligence which is helping humans to work efficiently, accurately, tirelessly, and in a timely manner. Thus, information technology is changing our life tremendously whether it is our home, leisure or work related activities. However, too much dependence on information technology, definitely, has drawbacks. As robots are being used in the production of automobiles, it is leading to unemployment among people, which in turn is taking away their earning opportunities. Furthermore, the web invisible web which technology has created is deteriorating human health simultaneously. Although, for example, mobile towers are being used for the smooth transmission of wireless signals for communication devices, harmful radiations generated through these are affecting health adversely. Hence, it should be used while taking care of all the living beings. In conclusion, it can be clearly seen that the benefits of information technology outweigh disadvantages. Despite some inevitable negative consequences, information technology is changing everything in all fields of life.
Enthusiasm for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
among human beings is increasing
rapidly
. It is
being utilized
almost everywhere, such as in our homes, during leisure time and at work places. This approach towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has enormous benefits despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages which
are written
in the following paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, with the advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, it is being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
throughout the world in every field of life. As it is being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
vastly
in the telecommunication sector, it has brought everyone closer to each other.
Moreover
, nowadays, schools, colleges, universities, and even privileged businesses across the world are embracing this advancement and
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go trading".
do trading
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.
For instance
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of internet, one can interact with anyone from the world with face-to-face video conferencing tool.
Furthermore
, researchers have developed techniques to generate artificial intelligence which is helping humans to work
efficiently
,
accurately
,
tirelessly
, and in a timely manner.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is changing our life
tremendously
whether it is our home, leisure or work related activities.

However
, too much dependence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, definitely, has drawbacks. As robots are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the production of automobiles, it is leading to unemployment among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which in turn is taking away their earning opportunities.
Furthermore
, the web invisible web which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has created is deteriorating human health
simultaneously
. Although,
for example
, mobile towers are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the smooth transmission of wireless signals for communication devices, harmful radiations generated through these are affecting health
adversely
.
Hence
, it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
while taking care of all the living beings.

In conclusion
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
outweigh disadvantages. Despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
inevitable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is changing everything in all fields of life.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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