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Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment, only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.34

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment, only governments and large companies can make a difference. v. 34
It is argued that big industries and government can do a lot to protect the nature of this world, whereas citizens cannot contribute enough to project it. I believe that large businesses and government can significantly improve the health of our current environment. This essay shall delve into how the assistance from the government bodies and companies can help revive the environment. Firstly, in most countries, the government has the right to implement new laws and regulations to give a life to the nature. If political leaders pass the environment protection bill and make it mandatory for the citizens of the respective countries to plant at least one tree in a month could make a huge impact on the nature. Moreover, government usually has the abundant capital that could be used to plant millions of trees around the country. For instance, leading political party in Canada has taken an oath to plant two million trees in next five years. Secondly, big industries can help revive the nature by using latest technologies and their workforce. Most of huge companies have various softwares that could help where most help is needed to save the environment. Furthermore, these companies have experts whose assistance might make a huge impact in changing the nature. For example, if big companies give a small amount of area to the greenery, this will have a big result on the environment. To conclude, strict rules and regulation from government might help revive the nature. Furthermore, industries should give a piece of their land for greenery. If the government and industries come together, then this dying planet can be saved.
It
is argued
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can do a lot to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
of this world, whereas citizens cannot contribute
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to project it. I believe that large businesses and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the health of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
environment. This essay shall delve into how the assistance from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
bodies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
revive the environment.

Firstly
, in most countries, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has the right to implement new laws and regulations to give a life to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. If political leaders pass the environment protection bill and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it mandatory for the citizens of the respective countries to plant at least one tree in a month could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a huge impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
usually
has the abundant capital that could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to plant millions of trees around the country.
For instance
, leading political party in Canada has taken an oath to plant two million trees in
next
five years.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
revive the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
by using
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
technologies and their workforce. Most of huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
have various
Possible spelling mistake found.
softwares
that could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
where most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
is needed
to save the environment.
Furthermore
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
have experts whose assistance might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a huge impact in changing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
give a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
amount of area to the greenery, this will have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
result on the environment.

To conclude
, strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulation from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
revive the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
should give a piece of their land for greenery. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together, then this dying planet can
be saved
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment, only governments and large companies can make a difference. v. 34

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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