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Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.15

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. v. 15
Gretha Thunberg's campaign in favour of environment protection has promoted the idea that each person can contribute to this effort. The fact that the ecological crisis is a global issue raises the question of the limits of individual decisions. Can individuals do anything for the environment? This essay will argue that even though larger organizations represent the most relevant scale, individuals have to take their part into the fight agaisnt global warming. First of all, large companies and governments are the most relevant scale to save the planet. The former can change their way of production into a cleaner one whereas the latter can regulate. On the one hand, states have a major role to play because of their coercion power. In addition, smaller scales of political power must be involved such as municipality. For example, Paris has decided to start forbiding the most polluting cars. On the other hand, companies which pollutes can decide to stop producting goods that hurt the planet. For instance, Airbus tries to design new planes that needs less polluting components. Nonetheless, individuals are also able to make a small difference. In effect, it would be too easy to put on structures the whole responsibility for climate change. Deciding to use less water or taking the train instead of the plane should be considered as very effective ways of improving the environment. Producing certain meats such as beef requires much water and plants to make animal grow. As a consequence, reducing one's consumption could be useful to protect our ressources. To conclude, I would say that both structures and individuals have to feel concerned about climate change. The democratic system permits us to force these structures changing their point of view. Finally, individuals have to understand that they are part of the structures they criticize and that they have the power.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gretha
Thunberg's campaign in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of environment protection has promoted the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that each person can contribute to this effort. The fact that the ecological crisis is a global issue raises the question of the limits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
decisions. Can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
do anything for the environment? This essay will argue that
even though
larger organizations represent the most relevant scale,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take their part into the fight
Possible spelling mistake found.
agaisnt
global warming.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, large
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
are the most relevant scale to save the planet. The former can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their way of production into a cleaner one whereas the latter can regulate. On the one hand, states have a major role to play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their coercion power.
In addition
, smaller scales of political power
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be involved
such as municipality.
For example
, Paris has decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
Possible spelling mistake found.
forbiding
the most polluting cars.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
which pollutes can decide to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
Possible spelling mistake found.
producting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
that hurt the planet.
For instance
, Airbus tries to design new
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
planes
that needs less polluting components.

Nonetheless,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are
also
able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
difference. In effect, it would be too easy to put on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structures
the whole responsibility for climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. Deciding to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
less water or taking the train
instead
of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
should
be considered
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
effective ways of improving the environment. Producing certain meats such as beef requires much water and plants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
animal grow. As a consequence, reducing one's consumption could be useful to protect our
Possible spelling mistake found.
ressources
.

To conclude
, I would say that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
feel concerned about climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. The democratic system permits us to force these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structures
changing their point of view.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
understand that they are part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structures
they criticize and that they have the power.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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