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Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only government and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.1

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only government and large companies can make a difference. v. 1
There is a growing debate on who should be responsible for making the environment better. It is believed by some that individuals have no role to play as big organizations and government ought to be solely saddled with the responsibility. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with this as I believe that achieving a serene and developed environment is a collective responsibility of both governing agencies, companies and the entire populace. To start with, individuals participating in environmental improvement will bring about fast-paced development and a serene society to live in. Although governing agencies and large organization are majorly saddled with the responsibility of legislating laws and providing amenities for people to live comfortably, adhering to rules and regulation on the part of the individuals will ensure progress of the society, hence, the role of the populace in achieving growth and development cannot be overemphasized. For instance, many of the amenities and artifacts put in place to benefit people and beautify the environment in Lagos have been destroyed or stolen by unscrupulous inhabitants. This further helps to drawback environmental progress. Furthermore, the burden of a deteriorated environment is felt more by the people and as such, individuals should be devoted to collaborating with governments and big companies to ensure a growing society is achieved. To illustrate further, governments sometimes are incapacitated and most times not privy to information on the true state of things in our neighborhood. Therefore, it becomes the duty of the populace to render assistance through suggestion of innovative ideas, constructive criticism and report of societal ills to concerned agencies. For instance, Ilopoju, a rural town in Oyo State, Nigeria, was able to curb incessant banditry in the area by way of people giving police strategic information about the perpetrators of the menace. In conclusion, to ameliorate the environment, I believe there is a need for a collaborative effort from individuals, governing agencies and big companies as a whole and only when this happens can a significant progressed be achieved in the society
There is a growing debate on who should be responsible for making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
better. It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
have no role to play as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
organizations and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ought to be
solely
saddled with the responsibility. In my opinion, I
strongly
disagree with this as I believe that achieving a serene and developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is a collective responsibility of both governing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agencies
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and the entire populace.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
participating in environmental improvement will bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced development and a serene
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in. Although governing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agencies
and large organization are
majorly
saddled with the responsibility of legislating laws and providing amenities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
comfortably
, adhering to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulation on the part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
will ensure progress of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
,
hence
, the role of the populace in achieving growth and development cannot
be overemphasized
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the amenities and artifacts put in place to benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and beautify the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
in Lagos have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
or stolen by unscrupulous inhabitants. This
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to drawback environmental progress.

Furthermore
, the burden of a deteriorated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is felt
more by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and as such,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
should
be devoted
to collaborating with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to ensure a growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is achieved
. To illustrate
further
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
are incapacitated
and most times not privy to information on the true state of things in our neighborhood.
Therefore
, it becomes the duty of the populace to render assistance through suggestion of innovative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
, constructive criticism and report of societal ills to concerned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agencies
.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ilopoju
, a rural town in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Oyo
State, Nigeria, was able to curb incessant banditry in the area by way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
giving police strategic information about the perpetrators of the menace.

In conclusion
, to ameliorate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
, I believe there is a need for a collaborative effort from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
, governing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agencies
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
as a whole and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when this happens can a significant progressed
be achieved
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only government and large companies can make a difference. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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