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Independent speaking (question 1)Who is the most intelligent person you know? Describe the person and say why you think he/she is intelligent. v.1

Independent speaking (question 1)Who is the most intelligent person you know? Describe the person and say why you think he/she is intelligent. v. 1
People are now arguing about the education system having the same teacher for years or it is better for students to be taught by different teachers. For me, I would go with the opinion to have different ones because these reasons below: Firstly, the fact of having students' changes and limitations in tutor' ability to adopt those changes. When students grow, they change so much in their interest, ability to study, what they want to be in the future and therefore tutors - who are the closet with them - need to adjust teaching methods to show their knowledge to pupils. But, on the other hand, educators are now produced to specialize in one field, especially, all teaching methods they are trained now only fix with a particular level of education. So the same school teacher can't give different level of students the best and suitable methods of teaching when their students are changing (both mental and physical sides). Second, different instructors give students a chance to explore the world and understand themselves in another aspect. Everyone has their own perspective, which affects how they see the world, including themselves. So do teachers, information, attitudes, judgments they only show students one angle. The world is multiform and each person is a different one. So finding true selves is a procedure in which people got to know things in many aspects, in many point views, and only being taught by different instructors can give students this chance. Two reasons above illustrate my view of 2 different kinds of education. Having teachers changing could benefit students in improve, diversify information and knowledge.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
arguing about the education system having the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
for years or it is better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
be taught
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
. For me, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
the opinion to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these reasons below:

Firstly
, the fact of having students'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
and limitations in tutor' ability to adopt those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
grow, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much in their interest, ability to study, what they want to be in the future and
therefore
tutors
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
who are the closet with them
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
need to adjust teaching methods to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their knowledge to pupils.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
on the other hand
, educators are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
produced to specialize in one field,
especially
, all teaching methods they
are trained
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
with a particular level of education.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the same school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
can't give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
the best and suitable methods of teaching when their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are changing (both mental and physical sides).

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
instructors give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
a chance to explore the world and understand themselves in another aspect. Everyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
perspective, which affects how they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the world, including themselves.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
, information, attitudes, judgments they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
one angle. The world is multiform and each person is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
one.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
finding true selves is a procedure in which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to know things in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
point views, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
being taught
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
instructors can give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
this chance.

Two reasons above illustrate my view of 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
kinds of education. Having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
changing could benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
, diversify information and knowledge.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The conquest of learning is achieved through the knowledge of languages.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Independent speaking (question 1)Who is the most intelligent person you know? Describe the person and say why you think he/she is intelligent. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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