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in times of an economic crises, in which area should governments reduce their spending? 1- scientific researches2-art3-park and public gardens v.2

in times of an economic crises, in which area should governments reduce their spending? 1- scientific researches2-art3-park and public gardens v. 2
The question is whether government should reduce its spending in arts, scientific researches or parks and public gardens when it is struggling with economic crises. Everyone in consideration to his private view point may maintain a specific direction toward this issue. Some believe that the state never dwindle its budget in park fields because without an appropriate green space, people may become depressed while others have a conviction that spending money on scientific researches or producing artworks would be beneficial, so the rulers should not manipulate their budget. I am unanimous with the latter group and the next paragraphs will vastly elucidate my vantage point through three salient reasons: To begin with, the crucial task in economic crises is that businessmen, sociologists, economists and other types of researchers evaluate the society and attempt to find the main root of trouble. Without them and their efforts, the government will not be able to be recovered itself. Besides, nowadays, the technology has kept marching forward and communities are competing with each other to achieve prosperity in a variety of fields; hence, stopping scientific researches may have destructive consequence. Needless to say through new discoveries and scientific projects, a country would gain financial profits. For instance, with investing and developing in the computer section, the engineers will tender the newest ideas or even better they will try to produce most up-dated tablets or cell phone; as a result, money would be returned into country. In addition, one should not forget that it is the rulers' task to assist people for having a happy spirit in the hard conditions. Reducing the art spending will also have negative impacts on human beings. During hardship, people need to do activities which could help them to overcome the difficulties. Going a painting exhibition or music concert cause damaged people to obtain the sense of peace. I remember when my father was a bankrupt and he was very upset and even depressed. One day my older brother offered him to participate in a painting workshop. My father had natural talent of painting and then participating in the mentioned workshop could revive him again. My purpose of saying the aforementioned memory was that art projects can be used as a natural drug in treating people in economic crises and they should not be eliminated. Moreover, every society have several parks or green space; therefore, instead of spending huge money on building new parks, the state should ask humans to behave with those existent green spaces adequately until the financial problem be solved. They just have to attempt not to harm trees, seat or other facilities and throw their trashes on the ground. To sum up, this conclusion could be drawn that in my view, the rulers must reduce park budget because using existent resources is more logical than stopping projects which will solve economic crisis.
The question is whether
government
should
reduce
its
spending
in arts,
scientific
researches or
parks
and public gardens when it is struggling with
economic
crises. Everyone in consideration to his private view point may maintain a specific direction toward this issue.
Some
believe that the state never dwindle its budget in
park
fields
because
without an appropriate green space,
people
may become depressed while others have a conviction that
spending
money on
scientific
researches or producing artworks would be beneficial,
so
the rulers should not manipulate their budget. I am unanimous with the latter group and the
next
paragraphs will
vastly
elucidate my vantage point through three salient reasons:

To
begin
with, the crucial task in
economic
crises is that businessmen, sociologists, economists and
other
types of researchers evaluate the society and attempt to find the main root of trouble. Without them and their efforts, the
government
will not be able to
be recovered
itself.
Besides
, nowadays, the technology has
kept
marching forward and communities are competing with each
other
to achieve prosperity in a variety of fields;
hence
, stopping
scientific
researches may have destructive consequence. Needless to say through new discoveries and
scientific
projects, a country would gain financial profits.
For instance
, with investing and developing in the computer section, the engineers will tender the newest
ideas
or even better they will try to produce most up-dated tablets or cell phone;
as a result
, money would
be returned
into country.

In addition
, one should not forget that it is the
rulers&
#039; task to assist
people
for having a happy spirit in the
hard
conditions. Reducing the art
spending
will
also
have
negative
impacts on human beings. During hardship,
people
need to do activities which could
help
them to overcome the difficulties. Going a painting exhibition or music concert cause damaged
people
to obtain the sense of peace. I remember when my father was a
bankrupt and
he was
very
upset and even depressed. One day my older brother offered him to participate in a painting workshop. My father had natural talent of painting and then participating in the mentioned workshop could revive him again. My purpose of saying the aforementioned memory was that art projects can be
used
as a natural drug in treating
people
in
economic
crises and
they should not
be eliminated
.

Moreover
, every society have several
parks
or green space;
therefore
,
instead
of
spending
huge money on building new
parks
, the state should ask humans to behave with those existent green spaces
adequately
until the financial problem
be solved
. They
just
have to
attempt not to harm trees, seat or
other
facilities and throw their trashes on the ground.

To sum up, this conclusion could
be drawn
that in my view, the rulers
must
reduce
park
budget
because
using existent resources is more logical than stopping projects which will solve
economic
crisis.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay in times of an economic crises, in which area should governments reduce their spending? 1- scientific researches2-art3-park and public gardens v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
476 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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