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In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v.10

In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 10
Recently, there is an increasing number of students opting to study abroad. This trend has created certain benefits, but there will be also some negative effects. On the one hand, studying overseas may provide students with better career opportunities. An international bachelor’s degree has global recognition and it will be easy to impress employers. As an example, McKinsey Vietnam is a subsidiary of the world’s most renowned consulting company. Now they are just recruiting people who have experienced tertiary education in foreign countries. Because working in a multinational corporation means that their staff has had to travel regularly between different nations, so the adaptability competency becomes the top requirement. Therefore, individuals have exposed to various norms, cultures and personalities will be priorities’ recruiter. On the other hand, the drawbacks of this development is the students come from different places in the world may face many mental problems that would affect adversely their academic performances. It is clear that when a person lives in the culture, which are completely different to the one they have accustomed to, will find it hard to make friends and unable to get used to the environment. Consequently, those students feel difficult to focus on study. A British education report 2019, for instance, showed that international students who have extreme mental issues, such as homesickness, culture shock, etc. Can not concentrate fully in their study. As a result, the results of them often are lower than the ones have adjusted with the foreign environment. In conclusion, the benefit of spending the time on third-stage education in foreign countries is better opportunities for the future. However, the downside would emerge consequently in terms of problems associated with mentality they may have to deal with.
Recently, there is an increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
opting to study abroad. This trend has created certain benefits,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there will be
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.

On the one hand, studying overseas may provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with better career opportunities. An international bachelor’s degree has global recognition and it will be easy to impress employers. As an example, McKinsey Vietnam is a subsidiary of the world’s most renowned consulting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
recruiting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have experienced tertiary education in foreign countries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
working in a multinational corporation means that their staff has had to travel
regularly
between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the adaptability competency becomes the top requirement.
Therefore
, individuals have exposed to various norms, cultures and personalities will be priorities’ recruiter.

On the other hand
, the drawbacks of this development is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places in the world may face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
mental problems that would affect
adversely
their academic performances. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that when a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the culture, which are completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
to the one they have accustomed to, will find it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friends and unable to
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get
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used
to the environment.
Consequently
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
feel difficult to focus on study. A British education report 2019,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who have extreme mental issues, such as homesickness, culture shock, etc. Can not concentrate
fully
in their study.
As a result
, the results of them
The adverb 'often' usually goes after the verb 'are'.
often are
lower than the ones have adjusted with the foreign environment.

In conclusion
, the benefit of spending the time on third-stage education in foreign countries is better opportunities for the future.
However
, the downside would emerge
consequently
in terms of problems associated with mentality they may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
deal with.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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