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The only way to solve the increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree? v.6

Family environment and upbringing has a huge impact on the psychology of a child. It is the value system they are brought up in that shapes their personalities. I completely agree that parenting skills play a major role in how children behave in society. Many studies point to an unhappy childhood as the root cause of juveniles committing acts of crime. Parenting skills are an ignored topic in many societies. Learning how to communicate better with children is a skill that needs nurturing and development over time. One needs to understand the impact that bad parenting can have on children. In recent years we have seen a rise in Juvenile crime. This could be due to families becoming more nuclear and not having the support or wisdom of elders in the family. There is also an increasing trend of both parents working which can make a child feel alone and disconnected from the family. Given these circumstances, it becomes essential for parents to communicate well and to plan their schedules effectively. These skills are not viewed as essential by a lot of parents. This can have a negative impact on the behavior of a child and cause feelings of depression, anger and sadness. If these feelings are left unaddressed, they can escalate into acts of crime. For a harmonious and peaceful society, every individual needs to contribute and develop the future generation is a task that starts at home. Hence, teaching parenting skills to parents is the right approach to decreasing the crime rate of young offenders.
Family environment and upbringing has a huge impact on the psychology of a child. It is the value system they
are brought
up in that shapes their personalities. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that parenting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
play a major role in how children behave in society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
studies point to an unhappy childhood as the root cause of juveniles committing acts of crime.

Parenting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
topic in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies. Learning how to communicate better with children is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
that needs nurturing and development over time. One needs to understand the impact that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
parenting can have on children. In recent years we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a rise in Juvenile crime. This could be due to families becoming more nuclear and not having the support or wisdom of elders in the family.

There is
also
an increasing trend of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
working which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a child feel alone and disconnected from the family.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
these circumstances, it becomes essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to communicate well and to plan their schedules
effectively
.

These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are not viewed as essential by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. This can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the behavior of a child and cause feelings of depression, anger and sadness. If these feelings are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
unaddressed, they can escalate into acts of crime.

For a harmonious and peaceful society, every individual needs to contribute and develop the future generation is a task that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
at home.
Hence
, teaching parenting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
is the right approach to decreasing the crime rate of young offenders.
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IELTS essay The only way to solve the increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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