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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. You should v. 5

In the olden days people only bought what they needed. However, over the last few decades, their purchasing power has increased and now shopping has become the favorite pastime of many people. In my opinion, this development should be discouraged because excessive consumption is bad for both the society and the environment. The society has become more affluent over the years. Consequently, they now buy just about anything they can find in the market. It does not really bother them whether they actually need the product or not. Shopping has become a hobby and that explains why people constantly upgrade their mobile phones and cars. To take advantage of this compulsive urge to shop, manufacturers release upgraded versions of their gadgets every six months. The changes could be superficial and yet people place their order months in advance. A disturbing aspect of this trend is that it leads to competition among peers. Mindless consumption also lands people in deep financial difficulty. Credit cards are widely available now and hence people can buy even if they do not have money in the wallet. Unfortunately, when they default on the card payment, they fall into the debt trap. Another major downside of excessive consumption is that it leads to the production of more garbage. Landfills are already overflowing with products that are still very much usable. This causes land and water pollution. Another disadvantage of this development is that it results in further depletion of resources that have already become scarce. For example, when the demand for furniture increases more trees have to be cut down. Production also requires electricity and this leads to the burning of more fossil fuels. In conclusion, when shopping becomes a hobby it does not benefit anyone. It lands the shopper in financial difficulty and also hurts the environment. Therefore, I believe that this is a negative development and it should be discouraged.

IELTS essay In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend? You should give reasons for your answer using your own ideas and experience. v.5

In the olden days
people
only
bought
what they needed.
However
, over the last few decades, their purchasing power has increased and
now
shopping has
become
the favorite pastime of
many
people
. In my opinion, this development should
be discouraged
because
excessive consumption is
bad
for both the society and the environment.

The society has
become
more affluent over the years.
Consequently
, they
now
buy
just
about anything they can find in the market. It does not
really
bother them whether they actually need the product or not. Shopping has
become
a hobby and that
explains
why
people
constantly
upgrade their mobile phones and cars. To take advantage of this compulsive urge to shop, manufacturers release upgraded versions of their gadgets every six months. The
changes
could be superficial and
yet
people
place their order months in advance.

A disturbing aspect of this trend is that it leads to competition among peers. Mindless consumption
also
lands
people
in deep financial difficulty. Credit cards are
widely
available
now
and
hence
people
can
buy
even if they do not have money in the wallet. Unfortunately, when they default on the card payment, they fall into the debt trap.

Another major downside of excessive consumption is that it leads to the production of more garbage. Landfills are already overflowing with products that are
still
very
much usable. This causes land and water pollution. Another disadvantage of this development is that it results in
further
depletion of resources that have already
become
scarce.
For example
, when the demand for furniture increases more trees
have to
be
cut
down. Production
also
requires electricity and this leads to the burning of more fossil fuels.

In conclusion
, when shopping
becomes
a hobby it does not benefit anyone. It lands the shopper in financial difficulty and
also
hurts the environment.
Therefore
, I believe that this is a
negative
development and it should
be discouraged
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
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Essay
5 paragraphs
316 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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