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Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by just legalizing all drugs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? v.1

Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by just legalizing all drugs. with this? v. 1
Nowadays, drugs are used extensively across the globe. While few of them are good for the body and there are others that aren't. These are extensively used by the pharmaceutical companies for their bread and butter. Legalizing illegal drugs is a debate that has been going around for decades together. In this essay we shall discuss both views before forming an opinion. Some people consider making illicit drugs legal. They believe this would reduce the overusage of these substances. The humans would use this in moderation and would not resort to smuggling of the same. So many of these medicines actually have medicinal properties. These are also scientifically proved to cure several diseases. For example, any kind of Marijauna is banned in India. However, the FDA results have proved that it cures cancer, epilepsy and improves concentration. Finally, these adults do have a point due to the medical benefits provided. On the other hand, a few people may disagree with legalization of the same. The reasons being the harmful effects on the human body when used in excess. When resources are available in plenty we humans tend to overexploit. For instance, vape is a drug that is being used vigorously in the USA. Further, several people have lost their lives due to this. The group here do make a point as drugs cannot be used for a reason of escapism. To conclude, I am for legitimization of these substances. The clause here is that it should provide medical benefits. The rest of them should be banned and way beyond reach to the public in general.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
extensively
across the globe. While few of them are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the body and there are others that aren't. These are
extensively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the pharmaceutical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
for their bread and butter. Legalizing illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
is a debate that has been going around for decades together. In this essay we shall discuss both views
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
forming an opinion.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider making illicit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
legal. They believe this would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
overusage
of these substances. The humans would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this in moderation and would not resort to smuggling of the same.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of these medicines actually have medicinal properties. These are
also
scientifically
proved to cure several diseases.
For example
, any kind of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Marijauna
is banned
in India.
However
, the FDA results have proved that it cures cancer, epilepsy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
concentration.
Finally
, these adults do have a point due to the medical benefits provided.

On the other hand
, a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may disagree with legalization of the same. The reasons being the harmful effects on the human body when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in excess.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
resources are available in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
we humans tend to
Possible spelling mistake found.
overexploit
.
For instance
, vape is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
that is
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
vigorously
in the USA.
Further
, several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have lost their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
due to this. The group here do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a point as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for a reason of escapism.

To conclude
, I am for legitimization of these substances. The clause here is that it should provide medical benefits. The rest of them should
be banned
and way beyond reach to the public
in general
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by just legalizing all drugs. with this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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