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In the past many male leaders had led our society to conflicts and violence The world would be better governed and more peaceful if it were ruled by women To what extent do you agree or disagree v.1

In the past many male leaders had led our society to conflicts and violence The world would be better governed and more peaceful if it were ruled by women v. 1
After a specific time and area in the US, teens are unable to step out of their homes, unless they are with older ones. I personally believe, that it should be an act of safety for them, however it's only possible to some extent. In this essay we will discuss the reasons behind the statement. On the one hand, 'curfew' is imposed on those towns when something dangerous or suspicious act is found. Therefore, it is a kind of security which is required for minor because at this age, they don't understand between right or wrong. In the same way, if any, mature person is going along with them, it's not only protects the minor but also provides proper guidance how to act. For example, one of my friends who lives in the US got stuck in the terrorist area, fortunately he was with his mentor, who assist him to reach home with due support or act. On the other hand, the adolescent is the age when freedom is what needed utmost. Since, at the particular stage of life, teens crave to go out with friends and experience everything which provides satisfaction and adventures at the same time. Eventually, it's useful for the development in growing as they able to take decisions on their own in any circumstances. For instance, when curfew is imposed in my place in which my younger cousin was stuck with his friends, they able to come up with that difficult situation by taking decision independently. In my final analysis, it's very crucial for younger ones being with adult in those areas where they are not safe. However, restrictions are imposed on youth, but not all the time because they also need privilege to explore anytime or anywhere.
After a specific time and area in the US, teens are unable to step out of their homes, unless they are with older
ones
. I
personally
believe, that it should be an act of safety for them,
however
it's
only
possible to
some
extent. In this essay we will discuss the reasons behind the statement.

On the one hand, 'curfew'
is imposed
on those towns when something
dangerous
or suspicious act
is found
.
Therefore
, it is a kind of security which
is required
for minor
because
at this age, they don't understand between right or
wrong
.
In the same way
, if any, mature person is going along with them,
it's
not
only
protects the minor
but
also
provides proper guidance how to act.
For example
, one of my friends who
lives
in the US
got
stuck in the terrorist area,
fortunately
he was with his mentor, who assist him to reach home with due support or act.

On the other hand
, the adolescent is the age when freedom is what needed utmost. Since, at the particular stage of life, teens crave to go out with friends and experience everything which provides satisfaction and adventures at the same time.
Eventually
,
it's
useful for the development in growing as
they
able to take decisions on their
own
in any circumstances.
For instance
, when curfew
is imposed
in my place in which my younger cousin
was stuck
with his friends,
they
able to
come
up with that difficult situation by taking decision
independently
.

In my final analysis,
it's
very
crucial for younger
ones
being with adult in those areas where they are not safe.
However
, restrictions
are imposed
on youth,
but
not all the time
because
they
also
need privilege to explore anytime or anywhere.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay In the past many male leaders had led our society to conflicts and violence The world would be better governed and more peaceful if it were ruled by women v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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