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In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.9

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem? v. 9
It is no doubt true that there are many breakthroughs in the field of farming in recent years. However, hunger still to haunt many million people over the world and the number of people living in poverty is no sign of decline. This essay will mention some major causes and measures should be taken to solve this phenomenon. Due to the development of the economy and average people living standard, many areas in the world have faced with inflation and that would lead to growth in the product price including food. While the income of some people still unchanged and people in poor those who even do not possess any land to self-cultivate. As a result, if the food does not be provided in concessional rate, they would not access it. Another reason is due to climate change in recent decades. Drought, tsunami, earthquake and many other natural disasters have taken away asset of many residents worldwide. Some areas of Africa, for example, have not rained in many years. Consequently, people living in these regions cannot grow their crops. They depend on food that was grown in other areas and if that is not available, then these people will have to go hungry. However, there are several actions that could be taken to mitigate the problem mentioned above. Firstly, The government need to ensure that food is always available for needy people or at a reasonable price. For instance, in developing countries, people in need can receive free products like meat, rice, the bread which already reached expiry date but can still be used at local supermarkets. In addition, The authorities should also provide financial support for poor farmers such as Low-interest loans to create the chance for them to cultivate for providing food for themselves and for the market. Secondly, It is better for wealthy nations which grow surplus food to show the generous to share their excess with poor countries that do not have enough food for citizens. International organizations have to play an important role in ensuring that nations share their rich and resources with those that need it. In conclusion, although it is obvious that productivity in agriculture has improved owing to technology advance, numerous people are still deprived of the food necessity. However, governments must have the responsibility to implement a range of measures to enhance the quality of life for the poor and reduce the poverty rate.
It is no doubt true that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
breakthroughs in the field of farming in recent years.
However
, hunger
still
to haunt
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
over the world and the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in poverty is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of decline. This essay will mention
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major causes and measures should
be taken
to solve this phenomenon.

Due to the development of the economy and average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living standard,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
areas in the world have faced with inflation and that would lead to growth in the product price including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. While the income of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
unchanged and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
those who even do not possess any land to self-cultivate.
As a result
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
does not
be provided
in concessional rate, they would not access it. Another reason is due to climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in recent decades. Drought, tsunami, earthquake and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other natural disasters have taken away asset of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
residents worldwide.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
areas of Africa,
for example
, have not rained in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in these regions cannot grow their crops. They depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that
was grown
in other areas and if
that is
not available, then these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go hungry.

However
, there are several actions that could
be taken
to mitigate the problem mentioned above.

Firstly
, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
need to ensure that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is always available for needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or at a reasonable price.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in need can receive free products like meat, rice, the bread which already reached expiry date
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
can
still
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
at local supermarkets.
In addition
, The authorities should
also
provide financial support for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
farmers such as Low-interest loans to create the chance for them to cultivate for providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
for themselves and for the market.
Secondly
, It is better for wealthy nations which grow surplus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the generous to share their excess with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
countries that do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
for citizens. International organizations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in ensuring that nations share their rich and resources with those that need it.

In conclusion
, although it is obvious that productivity in agriculture has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
owing to technology advance, numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
still
deprived of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
necessity.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have the responsibility to implement a range of measures to enhance the quality of life for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the poverty rate.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem? v. 9

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
403 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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