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In some countries, most people prefer to rent their homes rather than buying them. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of renting homes? v.10

In some countries, most people prefer to rent their homes rather than buying them. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of renting homes? v. 10
In this modern world, it is observed that, many people are interested to stay in rented house rather than buying a new home. There are multifarious advantages in staying in a rented house and also there are few disadvantages, which I will outline in this essay. To embark on, firstly, financially it is very reliable to rent a house, wherein you need to pay particular amount on a monthly basis. Secondly, as a tenant, you need not to bother about the services such as water, electricity and security, these are taken care by the owner of the house. Moreover, most of the employees who live in the metropolitan cities are tend to transfer to other places frequently, so most of them prefer to live in a rented flat. Furthermore, one must spend huge amount and time to build a house with all the amenities in the desired location. On the other hand, turning to the disadvantages of this trend, it has become extremely difficult in some places to find out a rental house. Nowadays, due to the significant increase in the demand for the rental houses, made the rental charges very high. Moreover, tenants have to sign the lease for 12 months. For instance, my brother, who was recently shifted to Toronto, had to pay a ten thousand dollars in advance. Furthermore, if any, equipment is damaged in the rented house, tenants are supposed to pay the full price for it. To conclude, there are several merits to be as a tenant such as financial and economic benefits, which lead to this trend. However, there are few demerits, which cannot be ignored like finding a rental house in big cities.
In this modern world, it
is observed
that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are interested
to stay in rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
rather
than buying a new home. There are multifarious advantages in staying in a rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and
also
there are few disadvantages, which I will outline in this essay.

To embark on,
firstly
,
financially
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
reliable to rent a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, wherein you need to pay particular amount on a monthly basis.
Secondly
, as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tenant
, you need not
Did you mean "bother"?
to bother
about the services such as water, electricity and security, these
are taken
care by the owner of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
Moreover
, most of the employees who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the metropolitan cities are
Consider using a past participle here: "tended".
tend
to transfer to other places
frequently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
most of them prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a rented flat.
Furthermore
, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
spend huge amount and time to build a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
with all the amenities in the desired location.

On the other hand
, turning to the disadvantages of this trend, it has become
extremely
difficult in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
places to find out a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. Nowadays, due to the significant increase in the demand for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
, made the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rental
charges
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tenants
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
the lease for 12 months.
For instance
, my brother, who was recently shifted to Toronto, had to pay a ten thousand dollars in advance.
Furthermore
, if any, equipment
is damaged
in the rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tenants
are supposed
to pay the full price for it.

To conclude
, there are several merits to be as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tenant
such as financial and economic benefits, which lead to this trend.
However
, there are few demerits, which cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
like finding a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay In some countries, most people prefer to rent their homes rather than buying them. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of renting homes? v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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