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In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.15

In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work? v. 15
In certain European countries, while other pupils stay in school to learn general education, children of a particular age range learn skills needed to be successful at work. This essay will consider what schools can do to prepare students for the marketplace. Firstly, many people develop career interests at a tender age. Hence, schools should provide platforms that can help their pupils develop practical skills needed at a job by incorporating more practical oriented classes in their curriculum. For instance, workshops and practical classes such as farming in agricultural science and laboratory work in chemistry go a long way in helping children discover where their interests lie. Whether a child will be interested in becoming a farmer or a researcher can be determined by such classes. Secondly, teachers should take responsibility for each child under their care and ensure that the skills needed in the marketplace are taught and practised during lessons. For example, strengths such as; negotiation, effective communication, organization and leadership are what employers look out for in their prospective employees. If these skills are imbibed into school children, they become more prepared for the world of work and eventually become successful employees of any organization they find themselves. In conclusion, there are a lot of ways in which academic institutions can help students develop the abilities needed for jobs. While some students may be interested in general academic learning, pupils who are less interested in this aspect of education should have unrestricted access to the education they need.
In certain European countries, while other pupils stay in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
to learn general education, children of a particular age range learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
to be successful at work. This essay will consider what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
can do to prepare students for the marketplace.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
develop career interests at a tender age.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should provide platforms that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their pupils develop practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
at a job by incorporating more practical oriented classes in their curriculum.
For instance
, workshops and practical classes such as farming in agricultural science and laboratory work in chemistry go a long way in helping children discover where their interests lie. Whether a child will
be interested
in becoming a farmer or a researcher can
be determined
by such classes.

Secondly
, teachers should take responsibility for each child under their care and ensure that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
in the marketplace
are taught
and
Possible spelling mistake. 'practised' is British English.
practised
during lessons.
For example
, strengths such as; negotiation, effective communication, organization and leadership are what employers look out for in their prospective employees. If these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are imbibed
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
children, they become more prepared for the world of work and
eventually
become successful employees of any organization they find themselves.

In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
ways in which academic institutions can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
students develop the abilities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
for jobs. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
students may
be interested
in general
academic learning, pupils who are less interested in this aspect of education should have unrestricted access to the education they need.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work? v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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