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In some countries governments pay the money for students’ university fees，while in other countries, students pay for themselves. Do advantages of governments paying for the students outweigh its disadvantages？ v.1

In some countries governments pay the money for students’ university fees，while in other countries, students pay for themselves. Do advantages of governments paying for the students outweigh its disadvantages？ v. 1
Many people say that movies can now be seen on various gadgets without going to the theatre. However, others still support the notion of enjoying the movies in cinema halls. I strongly believe that nothing can beat the thrill of watching a film on the big screen. To begin with, movie goers need relaxation and convenience both while watching movies. These aspects are fulfilled at home by the smart devices and we can watch a movie at our leisure. Also, one can browse through other websites while watching a film as per their wish. For example, you can pause and stop a film as per the need. This enables users to enjoy film comfortably at home. Furthermore, the availability of the numerous entertainment platforms like Netflix, Amazon Prime and Hotstar simplifies the movie lovers to enjoy their favourite movies at a cheaper rate as compared to a movie ticket. It saves both time and money on travelling and buying a ticket and appetizers. Also, these online streaming websites releases the latest movies incessantly which helps the users to watch it later. On the contrary, the enjoyment of the visual effects and the excellent sound quality cannot be replaced by the smartphones. You can see the motion pictures on silver screen with outstanding picture quality. Particularly, they offer the supporting devices to enjoy the 3D, 4D, IMAX prints with astonishing sound effects. Hence, the viewers are inevitably engaged. Moreover, the theatres offer exceptionally comfortable and cosy couches which an individual cannot get at home. For example, during the marvellous scenes in movies like “Fast and Furious”, “Captain America”, one can enjoy the vibration on the couch which feels as if we are watching a live performance. It creates a zeal among viewers before the release of such magnificent blockbusters. In conclusion, undoubtedly the experience of watching the stellar performers on big screen along with the wonderful acoustics is impressive and memorable.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on various gadgets without going to the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
.
However
, others
still
support the notion of enjoying the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
in cinema halls. I
strongly
believe that nothing can beat the thrill of watching a film on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
screen.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
goers need relaxation and convenience both while watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. These aspects
are fulfilled
at home by the smart
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
devices and
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
at our leisure.
Also
, one can browse through other websites while watching a film as per their wish.
For example
, you can pause and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
a film as per the need. This enables users to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
film
comfortably
at home.

Furthermore
, the availability of the numerous entertainment platforms like Netflix, Amazon Prime and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hotstar
simplifies the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
lovers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
at a cheaper rate as compared to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
ticket. It saves both time and money on travelling and buying a ticket and appetizers.
Also
, these online streaming websites releases the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
incessantly
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the users to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
it later.

On the contrary
, the enjoyment of the visual effects and the excellent sound quality cannot
be replaced
by the smartphones. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the motion pictures on silver screen with outstanding picture quality.
Particularly
, they offer the supporting devices to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
the 3D, 4D, IMAX prints with astonishing sound effects.
Hence
, the viewers are
inevitably
engaged.

Moreover
, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
offer
exceptionally
comfortable and
Possible spelling mistake. 'cosy' is British English.
cosy
couches which an individual cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
at home.
For example
, during the
Possible spelling mistake. 'marvellous' is British English.
marvellous
scenes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
like “
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
and Furious”, “Captain America”, one can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enjoy
the vibration on the couch which feels as if we are watching a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
performance. It creates a zeal among viewers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the release of such magnificent blockbusters.

In conclusion
,
undoubtedly
the experience of watching the stellar performers on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
screen along with the wonderful acoustics is impressive and memorable.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries governments pay the money for students’ university fees，while in other countries, students pay for themselves. Do advantages of governments paying for the students outweigh its disadvantages？ v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
320 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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