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In some countries, girls and boys are educated in different schools rather than in the same school. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this? v.2

In some countries, girls and boys are educated in different schools rather than in the same school. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this? v. 2
In some countries, it is a common situation that male and female students are taught separately in most schools. Some people believe that it is a beneficial method considering the fray usually occurs in schools while others disagree with it. This essay will opine that better concentration in class is the biggest upside of this and poor understanding among two genders as a result of studying in a single sex school and insufficient communication with the opposite gender are the primary disadvantages. One evident benefit to being educated in single-sex school that it improves the ability to focus during the class. This can be considered as a benefit because in schools with mixed gender there are usually myriad crucial problems between some students such as couples. Therefore, this factor leads to poor concentration on studies and eventually failing the semester. Whereas in the single-sex schools there are less relationship problems due to lack of distracting feeling towards the opposite sex. For instance, there are a great number of single-gender schools which bring up more successful and attentive students compared to diverse schools in some developing countries. On the contradictory, only interacting with the people that belongs to the same sex as the person may have negative results such as inability to understand opposite gender and generate communication with them. Lacking the aptitude of showing empathy to the other sex can cause some major problems in future relationships, such as friendship and marriage as well as make the person seem ignorant. As for lack of communication skills, there are numerous disadvantageous outcomes of having tenuous interact with the opposite gender in professional life, such as failing in cooperative works or inefficient working as a pair. According to the survey that is carried out in several countries, the workers who have finished single-sex schools are less profitable than the others. To conclude, while there is one big advantage of implementation of having separate schools for each gender, tremendous demerits exist as well. Keeping the number of single-sex schools few may compensate the positive and negative sides.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries, it is a common situation that male and female students
are taught
separately
in most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that it is a beneficial method considering the fray
usually
occurs in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
while others disagree with it. This essay will opine that better concentration in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
is the biggest upside of this and poor understanding among two genders
as a result
of studying in a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and insufficient communication with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
gender are the primary disadvantages.

One evident benefit to
being educated
in single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the ability to focus during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. This can
be considered
as a benefit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
with mixed gender there are
usually
myriad crucial problems between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
students such as couples.
Therefore
, this factor leads to poor concentration on studies and
eventually
failing the semester. Whereas in the single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
there are less relationship problems due to lack of distracting feeling towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
.
For instance
, there are a great number of single-gender
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
which bring up more successful and attentive students compared to diverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
.

On the contradictory,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
interacting with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that belongs to the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
as the person may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
results such as inability to understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
gender and generate communication with them. Lacking the aptitude of showing empathy to the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major problems in future relationships, such as friendship and marriage
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the person seem ignorant. As for lack of communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, there are numerous disadvantageous outcomes of having tenuous interact with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
gender in professional life, such as failing in cooperative works or inefficient working as a pair. According to the survey that
is carried
out in several countries, the workers who have finished single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are less profitable than the others.

To conclude
, while there is one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
advantage of implementation of having separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
for each gender, tremendous demerits exist
as well
. Keeping the number of single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
Possible agreement error. The noun may seems to be uncountable; consider using: "little may".
few may
compensate the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sides.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, girls and boys are educated in different schools rather than in the same school. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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