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In some countries, even though the rates of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it? v.8

In some countries, even though the rates of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it? v. 8
Despite the reduction in crime rate in nation around the globe, many citizens still feel unsafe. In my opinion, factors such as the misuse of social media and the inefficiency of the justice organization could be the reasons for this unrest. One reason people constantly feel insecure is that social media has become a tool used for the circulation of false news. Mischievous politicians who selfishly aim to promote their political propaganda use this as a medium to propagate false news. As a result, members of the society are burdened by troubling news thereby feeling unsafe. Another reason citizens feel insecure is due to the corruption of the justice department. The legal system has been manipulated such that many criminal cases are left unattended to. For this reason, people have lost faith in the competence of the court of law, hence, they feel insecure. In order to boost and restore the confidence of individuals in the society, there are a number of measures to be taken. Firstly, individuals ought to confirm the source of the information they get and its authenticity before forwarding it to their contact list. Also, the government should sensitise its citizens on the dangers of spreading false news. For instance, some months ago, radio stations aired advertisements, creating awareness of the need to curb the spread the spread of fake information as mandated by the government. Secondly, the image of the justice system has to be revamped. The judiciary should set up the legal system in a way that criminal cases would be heard and sentences pronounced without delay in order to restore the faith of citizens and keep them at ease. To conclude, even though criminal activities are on the decline globally, a series of events are responsible for the insecurity individuals feel. I believe the authorities, as well as members of the society have their roles to place to alleviate the feeling of unrest. For example, stopping the spread of fake information and restoring the image of the image of the judiciary in order to make citizens feel safe in their environment.
Despite the reduction in crime rate in nation around the globe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
unsafe. In my opinion, factors such as the misuse of social media and the inefficiency of the justice organization could be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
for this unrest.

One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
constantly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
insecure is that social media has become a tool
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the circulation of false
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. Mischievous politicians who
selfishly
aim to promote their political propaganda
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this as a medium to propagate false
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
As a result
, members of the society
are burdened
by troubling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
thereby feeling unsafe. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
insecure is due to the corruption of the justice department. The legal system has
been manipulated
such that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
criminal cases are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
unattended to. For this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have lost faith in the competence of the court of law,
hence
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
insecure.

In order to boost and restore the confidence of individuals in the society, there are a number of measures to
be taken
.
Firstly
, individuals ought to confirm the source of the information they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
and its authenticity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
forwarding it to their contact list.
Also
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
Possible spelling mistake. 'sensitise' is British English.
sensitise
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
of spreading false
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
months ago, radio stations aired advertisements, creating awareness of the need to curb
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "the spread".
the spread the spread
of fake information as mandated by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
Secondly
, the image of the justice system
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be revamped
. The judiciary should set up the legal system in a way that criminal cases would
be heard
and sentences pronounced without delay in order to restore the faith of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.

To conclude
,
even though
criminal activities are on the decline globally, a series of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
are responsible for the insecurity individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
. I believe the authorities,
as well
as members of the society have their roles to place to alleviate the feeling of unrest.
For example
, stopping the spread of fake information and restoring the image of the image of the judiciary in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
safe in their environment.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, even though the rates of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it? v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
348 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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