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In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v. 102 v.43

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion? v. 102 v. 43
Unhealthy lifestyle causes a lot of health issues and troubles. What is meant by unhealthy lifestyle? People who are living a busy life, usually eat junk food from various sources which leads to many serious health problems. I totally agree that governments should increase the taxes on those sources. This essay will discuss how government can apply this new regulation and encourage people to stay more fit. First and foremost, take away meals is one of the cons of our century. In fact, it is the main reason for many problems that we are facing nowadays. For instance, high blood pressure, diabetes and much more of the modern diseases are created by those wrong habits. Despite all awareness campaigns for healthcare, people are still ignoring that voice and continue in their practices. In fact, the public behaviour can't be controlled easily or by passive voices for health care. How then human behaviour can be controlled? The answer always by regulation. Taxes are the most effective way to encourage people to stay away from something. For example, it was successful when it applies to smoking tools like cigarettes and e-cigarettes. So it will be an advantage way to distance people from bad diet and shift their appetite for veggies and fruits. Moreover, taxes should be applied in a strategic manner and not to be applied at once. Furthermore, the restaurant permits for fast food business should be harder to get. To conclude, people will not stop eating unhealthy stuff by their own desire because it is the most easy way to get food. So a tax on this kind of business will force people for alternative and to keep them healthier. I highly encourage this step and to be one of many further steps to help people be fit and healthy.
Unhealthy lifestyle causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
health issues and troubles. What
is meant
by unhealthy lifestyle?
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who are living a busy life,
usually
eat junk food from various sources which leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
serious health problems. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
on those sources. This essay will discuss how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can apply this new regulation and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to stay more fit.

First
and foremost, take away meals is one of the cons of our century. In fact, it is the main reason for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems that we are facing nowadays.
For instance
, high blood pressure, diabetes and much more of the modern diseases
are created
by those
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
habits. Despite all awareness campaigns for healthcare,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
still
ignoring that voice and continue in their practices. In fact, the public
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
can't
be controlled
easily
or by passive voices for health care.

How then human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
can
be controlled
? The answer always by regulation.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Taxes
are the most effective way to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to stay away from something.
For example
, it was successful when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
applies to
smoking tools like cigarettes and e-cigarettes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it will be an advantage way to distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
diet and shift their appetite for veggies and fruits.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
should
be applied
Consider replacing "in a strategic manner" with the adverb for "strategic"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a strategic manner
and not to
be applied
at once.
Furthermore
, the restaurant permits for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food business should be harder to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
eating unhealthy stuff by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
desire
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
This adjective uses the short comparatives form.
the most easy
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
food.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on this kind of business will force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for alternative and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them healthier. I
highly
encourage this step and to be one of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
further
steps to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
be fit
and healthy.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. with this opinion? v. 102 v. 43

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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