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In some areas of the US, a ‘curfew’ is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion on this? v.25

Adolescents are not allowed to be outdoors unless they are supervised by an adult after a certain time at night, in several areas of the United States. The idea of imposing this ‘curfew’ cannot be totally refutable. In my opinion, restricting the teenagers to be out of doors at late night can ensure their safety up to a certain extent. However, this cannot be practical in all the scenarios, especially when there is a need to go outside at any point of the night due to some emergency situation which may arise. To begin with, in several areas of the US, the crime rates are exceeding in the recent days. We are aware that the anti-social activities such as drug trafficking, robbery, kidnapping and rape culture are at the peak during the late night. Adolescents are more susceptible to be a victim of the aforementioned activities due to their physical weaknesses or lack of awareness of the same. In recent days, a huge number of teenagers were reported to be harassed by pedophiles at late night, which affected dramatically to their physical, emotional as well as mental wellbeing. Such situations can be controlled when they are accompanied by an adult, or they are advised to be indoors after a certain time at night. In addition, imposing a curfew to be outdoors can have several disadvantages too. Especially, when the parents of these teenagers are employed for shift duties, or if they work in a 24-hour medical center where they have to work during the late nights. In such conditions, the adolescents will be forced to go outdoors in case of any medical emergency or to run errands, irrespective of the time. There are chances that any unavoidable situations may arise at any point of the day or night. Therefore, imposing a curfew may result in a negative impact than the advantages. To conclude, imposing a curfew for the adolescents to be outdoors after a particular time at night without the supervision of an adult cannot be totally agreeable, since it has its own advantages and disadvantages. I opine that the Government has to come up with more acceptable ideas to decrease the crime right without stripping away the fundamental right of every human being to move freely within the country at any point of time as per their desire.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Adolescents
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outdoors
unless they
are supervised
by an adult after a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
, in several areas of the United States. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imposing
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
‘curfew’
cannot be
totally
refutable. In my opinion, restricting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
to be out of doors at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
can ensure their safety up to a certain extent.
However
, this cannot be practical in all the scenarios,
especially
when there is a need to go outside at any point of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
emergency situation which may arise.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in several areas of the US, the crime rates are exceeding in the recent days. We are aware that the anti-social activities such as drug trafficking, robbery, kidnapping and rape culture are at the peak during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Adolescents
are more susceptible to be a victim of the aforementioned activities due to their physical weaknesses or lack of awareness of the same. In recent days, a huge number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
were reported
to
be harassed
by pedophiles at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
dramatically
to their physical, emotional
as well
as mental wellbeing. Such situations can
be controlled
when they
are accompanied
by an adult, or they
are advised
to be indoors after a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at night.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imposing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outdoors
can have several disadvantages too.
Especially
, when the parents of these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are employed
for shift duties, or if they work in a 24-hour medical center where they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
late
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nights
. In such conditions, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adolescents
will
be forced
to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outdoors
in case of any medical emergency or to run errands, irrespective of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. There are chances that any unavoidable situations may arise at any point of the day or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imposing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
may result in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact than the advantages.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imposing
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
curfew
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adolescents
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outdoors
after a particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
without the supervision of an adult cannot be
totally
agreeable, since it has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages and disadvantages. I opine that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with more acceptable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to decrease the crime right without stripping away the fundamental right of every human being to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
freely
within the country at any point of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
as per their desire.
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As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
389 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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