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In recent years, tourists have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people think that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.1

In recent years, tourists have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people think that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. with this opinion? v. 1
In recent years, the proliferation of supermarket has left local stores little room to compete and accordingly make them to close their business. This desperately ending is generally believed to result in the loss of local communities, which fails to gain my support. There is no doubt that the existence of supermarkets will develop local commerce and activities. Firstly, these can help guarantee the substantial output of regional products, which help maintain the frequent production of local business. For instance, the perishable food of farmers ranging from vegetables, fruits to dairy products can be well-preserved. Thus, supermarkets help flourish commercial activities instead of harming them. Secondly, if retailing businesses increase government finance through taxes, local authorities will be able to distribute this monetary gain to organize periodical events such as festival, outdoor games or build community halls for citizens to gather. It is evident that the extension of shopping malls can be beneficial to the regional dwellers. First, the unemployment rate can be reduced due to more employment opportunities. In other words, the erection of these buildings requires both manual labour like constructor or plumber and intellectual workers such as accountant or salesman, therefore, there are more job positions available for the resident. Second, big supermarkets offer many facilities ranging from cinema, game centre to the food court for customers to enjoy while shopping. A recent survey in HCM city has shown that inhabitants here love going to shopping centers because they can either shop for daily necessity or entertain. In conclusion, although the proliferation of supermarkets may threaten the local business existence, I believe this has just negatively affected the local population to a small extent since it brings more benefits to both the local economy and residents.
In recent years, the proliferation of supermarket has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
stores
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
room to compete and
accordingly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them to close their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. This
desperately
ending is
generally
believed to result in the loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities, which fails to gain my support.

There is no doubt that the existence of supermarkets will develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
commerce and activities.
Firstly
, these can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
guarantee the substantial output of regional products, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
maintain the frequent production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
.
For instance
, the perishable food of farmers ranging from vegetables, fruits to dairy products can be well-preserved.
Thus
, supermarkets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
flourish commercial activities
instead
of harming them.
Secondly
, if retailing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
increase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
finance through taxes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
authorities will be able to distribute this monetary gain to organize periodical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
such as festival, outdoor games or build community halls for citizens to gather.

It is evident that the extension of shopping malls can be beneficial to the regional dwellers.
First
, the unemployment rate can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
due to more employment opportunities.
In other words
, the erection of these buildings requires both manual
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
like constructor or plumber and intellectual workers such as accountant or salesman,
therefore
, there are more job positions available for the resident. Second,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
supermarkets offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
facilities ranging from cinema, game
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
to the food court for customers to enjoy while shopping. A recent survey in
Possible spelling mistake found.
HCM
city has shown that inhabitants here
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
going to shopping centers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can either shop for daily necessity or entertain.

In conclusion
, although the proliferation of supermarkets may threaten the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
existence, I believe this has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
negatively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
population to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
extent since it brings more benefits to both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
economy and residents.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay In recent years, tourists have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people think that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. with this opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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