Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping? Is this a positive or a negative development? v.10

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping? Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 10
Shopping is a very popular activity in many countries. Nowadays, customers prefer to buy in big shopping centres or malls due to which small local shops have closed. The reason for this is availability of all items at one single place and big discounts offered. This is a negative development as a financially weak shopkeeper suffers the most and ultimately they run out of business. Large shopping malls incorporate all the required items by a customer under one roof. This makes it easier for the buyer to purchase articles without going here and there. Due to this undue advantage, there is a trend change towards shopping from big city shops. Small shopkeepers are then not left with any choice but to close their shops and find some alternative earning method. For instance, after the opening of mega marts such as "Big Bazaar", local shopkeepers reported decline in their sales during an interview. Malls offer huge discounts over branded articles or clothes to attract more crowd to their shops. It is possible by them as they buy stocks in bulk and hence receive goods at less rate. Whereas, this is not the case with local owners. This makes it more difficult for them to sustain their business as less public would buy the products at an expensive rate. To conclude, many factors add up to small shops closing their business. Most important of them, more commuting to different shops to buy products make it hectic for a buyer to purchase goods and availability of items at cheaper rates in big malls.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular activity in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries. Nowadays, customers prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
or malls due to which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
have closed.
The reason for this is
availability of all items at one single place and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
discounts offered. This is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development as a
financially
weak shopkeeper suffers the most and
ultimately
they run out of business.

Large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls incorporate all the required items by a customer under one roof. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it easier for the buyer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
articles without going here and there. Due to this undue advantage, there is a trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Small
shopkeepers are then not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
with any choice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to close their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
and find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
alternative earning method.
For instance
, after the opening of mega marts such as
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Big
Bazaar
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, local shopkeepers reported decline in their sales during an interview.

Malls offer huge discounts over branded articles or clothes to attract more crowd to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
. It is possible by them as they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
stocks in bulk and
hence
receive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
at less rate.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, this is not the case with local owners. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it more difficult for them to sustain their business as less public would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
the products at an expensive rate.

To conclude
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
up to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
closing their business. Most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
of them, more commuting to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it hectic for a buyer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and availability of items at cheaper rates in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
malls.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping? Is this a positive or a negative development? v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts