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In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development? v.15

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development? v. 15
The modernization has certainly affected the people’s life momentarily. This has been introduced diversified in the shopping habits of many people. Due to the growing number of shopping malls has affected selling of small shops resulted in the decline of their number compare to the past. This trend having a plethora of advantages compares to disadvantages. The essay will discuss both points in below paragraphs. To begin with, the predominate merit for many people prefer to use shopping in malls are that it saves time and gives a variety of product at one place. This will become a benefit to the people who are working in the corporate world and having less time to manage their home and for relaxation. Although, this type of pattern can serve the consumer in a better way, this will also give some discounts on a certain product helps to maintain their budget also. Moreover, having availability of many items at one place such as clothes, kitchen, grocery would be considered as a key parameter for increasing the popularity of it. For example, with the advancement of shopping, many international items were also available at many rural areas as well; expands its popularity. On the other hand, there are a few points that affect the local shop vender in the detrimental manner. The first demerit is that people never try to use product which were made in their nation. If this type of routine will be continued for the years then, people will forget their ritual. Furthermore, this will also create a problem for the local retailer. As their products were not used by people, so this will decline their number soon. This will result that people have to suffer from the financial crisis. For instance, research conducted shows that advance effect of the international products and marketing by a famous person can become a positive point for the shopping mall, which affects the contradictory impact on the local products. In conclusion, the availability of many products at one place, having a variety of brands helps to increase the popularity of the shopping centre. However, this will also affect the local vendor and culture also suffer.
The modernization has
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life
momentarily
. This has
been introduced
diversified in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
habits of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Due to the growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
malls has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
selling of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
shops resulted in the decline of their number compare to the past. This trend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a plethora of advantages compares to disadvantages. The essay will discuss both points in below paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the predominate merit for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
in malls are that it saves time and gives a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
at one place. This will become a benefit to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are working in the corporate world and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
less time to manage their home and for relaxation. Although, this type of pattern can serve the consumer in a better way, this will
also
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
discounts on a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to maintain their budget
also
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
availability of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
items at one place such as clothes, kitchen, grocery would
be considered
as a key parameter for increasing the popularity of it.
For example
, with the advancement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
international items were
also
available at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rural areas
as well
; expands its popularity.

On the other hand
, there are a few points that affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
shop
Possible spelling mistake found.
vender
in the detrimental manner. The
first
demerit is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
never try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which
were made
in their nation. If this type of routine will
be continued
for the years then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will forget their ritual.
Furthermore
, this will
also
create a problem for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
retailer. As their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
were not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this will decline their number
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
. This will result that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
suffer from the financial crisis.
For instance
, research conducted
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that advance effect of the international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and marketing by a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
person can become a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
point for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
mall, which affects the contradictory impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
products.

In conclusion
, the availability of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
at one place,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a variety of brands
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to increase the popularity of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.
However
, this will
also
affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
vendor and culture
also
suffer.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development? v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
361 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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