Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In order to reduce crime, some argue that attacking its cause like poverty is the best solution, while others believe that putting more people in prisons and having more policemen are more convenient way in tackling crime. Discuss both sides and give your v.1

In order to reduce crime, some argue that attacking its cause like poverty is the best solution, while others believe that putting more people in prisons and having more policemen are more convenient way in tackling crime. 1
It is argued that people should keep their house and offices, neat and well managed. I totally agree with the notion because of the two prime reasons. Firstly, a clean and organized place make your life comfortable and easier and secondly, your inhabited surroundings say a lot about your personality, leaving an impression on the people you meet. A neat and well organized environment to work or live in, save people from many hassles and also keep their mood up. A settled office table does not demand to look up for a certain file or document, saving time and effort which is crucial in the workplace. As, for example, I personally faced delays and frustration in completing my tasks at the office, because of the mismanaged files and official stationery by the former employee. Additionally, things not kept at proper place sometimes can also prove to be hazardous. As one day we visited our neighbours and their kid choked over a date seed, which were thrown by an adult on the floor after eating. Furthermore, how a person keeps his home or office depicts much about his habits. A messy and dirty room will never leave a good impression on the guests, and same is for the workroom desk. I remember I was appreciated by the General Manager of the bank at his service quality visit for my well organized work setting and formal attire. These good impressions and appreciations also boost up your morale to perform better than before. In conclusion, it is completely admired that people should keep their home and offices neat and managed. Such environment besides keeping them comfortable and productive, also leave a good impression of them on others.
It
is argued
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
, neat and well managed. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the notion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the two prime reasons.
Firstly
, a clean and organized place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
your life comfortable and easier and
secondly
, your inhabited surroundings say a lot about your personality, leaving an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impression
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
.

A neat and well organized environment to work or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in, save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
hassles and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
their mood up. A settled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
table does not demand to look up for a certain file or document, saving time and effort which is crucial in the workplace. As,
for example
, I
personally
faced delays and frustration in completing my tasks at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the mismanaged files and official stationery by the former employee.
Additionally
, things not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
at proper place
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
can
also
prove to be hazardous. As one day we visited our
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
and their kid choked over a date seed, which
were thrown
by an adult on the floor after eating.

Furthermore
, how a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keeps
his home or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
depicts much about his habits. A messy and dirty room will never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impression
on the guests, and same is for the workroom desk. I remember I
was appreciated
by the General Manager of the bank at his service quality visit for my well organized work setting and formal attire. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impressions
and appreciations
also
boost up your morale to perform better than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.

In conclusion
, it is completely admired that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
keep
their home and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
neat and managed. Such environment
besides
keeping them comfortable and productive,
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impression
of them on others.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In order to reduce crime, some argue that attacking its cause like poverty is the best solution, while others believe that putting more people in prisons and having more policemen are more convenient way in tackling crime. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts