Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v.9

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 9
Home is a basic need of a human, to build it, there is no space available in a urban area, so they start to build it in the countryside. However, some believe that it is better to protect it rather than building homes. The essay will discuss the above notion. To begin with, one of the important thing is that people start to build their home in the countryside; there is no space available and the world population has been increased drastically. It is the basic need of everyone so they start to build at countryside even it cost’s less which would also be beneficial for the person. For instance, the cost of housing in the city is high in comparison of a house in rural area. Moreover, if a person can live in such an area, then it provides the fresh air and less noise which helps to improve health. As a result, building a home in such place person can get a place to live which having a less money requirement, provides fresh air and lots of space to live. On the other hand, some think that the countryside has been protected by not building a new home. Firstly, the countryside is a place which provides your natural beauty and manage the pollution of the nearby urban areas. If all the area is converted into this then there is no space is available for wild animals and which creates the threat to their survival. For instance, research conducted says that the countryside will also help to the rain cycle, if we destroy it entire life-cycle will destroy. Furthermore, it would be difficult for the person to survive having home, but not having a basic need such as, water, food will not be easily available. At last, it creates a situation in which life of all types of people goes in danger. In conclusion, to deal with the world’s population countryside is the best option to build the house. In my opinion a build new home in the countryside, but try to plant as much as trees, they maintain the environment as well.
Home is a basic need of a human, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
it, there is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
in
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
it in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it is better to protect it
rather
than building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. The essay will discuss the above notion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
their home in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
; there is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
and the world population has
been increased
drastically
. It is the basic need of everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
even it cost’s less which would
also
be beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
For instance
, the cost of housing in the city is high
in comparison
of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
Moreover
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in such an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, then it provides the fresh air and less noise which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
health.
As a result
, building a home in such place
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
which having a less money requirement, provides fresh air and lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
has
been protected
by not building a new home.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
is a place which provides your natural beauty and manage the pollution of the nearby urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. If all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
is converted
into this then there is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
for wild animals and which creates the threat to their survival.
For instance
, research conducted says that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to the rain cycle, if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
it entire life-cycle will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
.
Furthermore
, it would be difficult for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to survive having home,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not having a basic need such as, water, food will not be
easily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
. At last, it creates a situation in which life of all types of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
goes in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
.

In conclusion
, to deal with the world’s population
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
is the best option to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. In my opinion a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
build
new home in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countryside
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
try to plant as much as trees, they maintain the environment
as well
.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts