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In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v.30

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 30
Development in the most of the cities are saturated, such as building apartments and malls. To accommodate more population, it is necessary to extend and build new homes in the country side. It would develop the city, in terms of more employment and basic amenities such as schools, supermarkets and small scale industries. I admit the point, the government should focus the country side too, such development initiated would develop the lifestyle of the local population. A country's GDP cannot be weighed only with the growth of the major cities, it should be overall and covers the village too. For Instance, The Chennai city in the India, started developing after a major expansion plan initiated by constructing new homes and industries and following that, the numerous people shifted to the new location. Schools, supermarkets, pharmacies and small scale factories also increased in number and thus, job market also increased. On the other hand, people always love to stay in the village, because most of the them think, it is a destination to relax and if new homes built, it could affect nature and the environment. This is the argument, they put against others who support country side expansion. As an example, in The Germany, they expand the city by constructing a straight road and whatever comes in their way, they just clear it off, such as trees, water canals and ponds. It heavily affected the rain cycle, there was huge scarcity of water. It is not a better idea to build the city, by breaking the backbone (Agriculture) of its own. Finally, I am in favour of the idea and to develop a city, which can create more employment, encourages the flow of money and at the same time, it could act with full freedom and control body is necessary to streamline the activities.
Development in the most of the
cities
are saturated
, such as building apartments and malls. To accommodate more population, it is necessary to extend and build
new
homes in the country side. It would develop the city, in terms of more employment and basic amenities such as schools, supermarkets and
small
scale industries. I admit the point, the
government
should focus the country side too, such development initiated would develop the lifestyle of the local population.

A country's GDP cannot
be weighed
only
with the growth of the major
cities
, it should be
overall
and covers the village too.
For Instance
, The Chennai city in the India,
started
developing after a major expansion plan initiated by constructing
new
homes and industries and following that, the numerous
people
shifted to the
new
location. Schools, supermarkets, pharmacies and
small
scale factories
also
increased in number and
thus
, job market
also
increased.

On the other hand
,
people
always
love
to stay in the village,
because
most of
the them
think
, it is a destination to relax and if
new
homes built, it could affect nature and the environment. This is the argument, they put against others who support country side expansion. As an example, in The Germany, they expand the city by constructing a straight road and whatever
comes
in their way, they
just
clear
it off, such as trees, water canals and ponds. It
heavily
affected
the rain cycle, there was huge scarcity of water. It is not a better
idea
to build the city, by breaking the backbone (Agriculture) of its
own
.

Finally
, I am in
favour
of the
idea
and to develop a city, which can create more employment, encourages the flow of money and at the same time, it could act with full freedom and control body is necessary to streamline the activities.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
You live a new life for every new language you speak. If you know only one language, you live only once.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 30

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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