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In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not to build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v.26

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not to build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 26
Nowadays, global population is constantly increasing and consequently more and more houses are needed in many cities worldwide. For this reason, in many places there is little space to build new structures, and engineers have to project them in the countryside. At the same time, some eco-friendly activists claim that would be much more important to protect the countryside and the biodiversity which is present there. Governments and constructors definitely have to face this problem: the lack of available houses negatively affects the society, and forces people to live together in overcrowded flats. Then, this could contribute to the increase of crime in the suburbs and to the decline of life quality. On the other hand, some people may argue that containing smog in cities would be fundamental to safeguard the countryside. However, I believe that there would be many ways to limit the percentage of pollution caused by new houses: a possible approach could be improving standards and features of new constructions in a greener direction. Engineers and constructors may consult scientists and agree with them which would be the best measures to decrease gas emissions or other aspects related to ecology. Moreover, special trainers could talk to new residents, in order to raise their awareness on the importance of wildlife and the environment. To sum up, there would be many approaches to solve out this matter. Anyway, everybody needs homes to live with their own families in a dignified way, and this could awaken people to the importance of ecology.
Nowadays, global population is
constantly
increasing and
consequently
more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are needed
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cities worldwide.
For this reason
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
space to build
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
structures, and engineers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
project them in the countryside. At the same time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
eco-friendly activists claim that would be much more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to protect the countryside and the biodiversity which is present there.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
and constructors definitely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face this problem: the lack of available
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
negatively
affects the society, and forces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
together in overcrowded flats. Then, this could contribute to the increase of crime in the suburbs and to the decline of life quality.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may argue that containing smog in cities would be fundamental to safeguard the countryside.
However
, I believe that there would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to limit the percentage of pollution caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
: a possible approach could be improving standards and features of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
constructions in a greener direction. Engineers and constructors may consult scientists and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with them which would be the best measures to decrease gas emissions or other aspects related to ecology.
Moreover
, special trainers could talk to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
residents, in order to raise their awareness on the importance of wildlife and the environment.

To sum up, there would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
approaches to solve out this matter. Anyway, everybody needs homes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
families
Consider replacing "in a dignified way" with the adverb for "dignified"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a dignified way
, and this could awaken
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to the importance of ecology.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not to build new homes there. What is your opinion about this? v. 26

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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