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In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than the large groups. Is it a positive or negative development? v.1

In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than the large groups. Is it a positive or negative development? v. 1
Nowadays, there has been a rising trend for city dwellers to lead a solitary life or live in nuclear families rather than live in extended ones. Although this tendency may encounter several drawbacks, I am strongly convinced that living alone or in small-sized families have more benefits. On the one hand, people in metropolises choose to live alone or in small families may face some difficulties. Firstly, it is easy for them to suffer from the loneliness, especially the ones who live solitarily. Whenever they have trouble dealing with study or work, they might lose themselves because they have nobody to share their feelings. Secondly, living in a small family means the occupants are not able to have a chance to receive the advice from the elderly. Senior citizens have a life of experience and wisdom to guide their offspring to overcome any obstacles; so it will be a lack for those who live alone or small families. However, the greater outcomes from the way of living alone or in small family units are undeniable. To begin with, these people can enjoy their privacy as they do not need to share rooms or personal items with others. The young marriage couples, for example, have more space to express their emotions without any interruptions. As the consequence, less conflict is seen among them. What is more, citizens in cities must cover all kinds of bills, and most of them are incredibly high; therefore, if they have to make their living to support many family members, they obviously struggle with financial matters. However, living alone or in small families help them ease that burden. In conclusion, people in cities cannot avoid the disadvantages which they must deal with when choosing to live solitarily or in small units, I believe this lifestyle is far more beneficial to the occupants.
Nowadays, there has been a rising trend for city dwellers to lead a solitary life or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in extended ones. Although this tendency may encounter several drawbacks, I am
strongly
convinced that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
-sized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
have more benefits.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in metropolises choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
may face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties.
Firstly
, it is easy for them to suffer from the loneliness,
especially
the ones who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
solitarily
. Whenever they have trouble dealing with study or work, they might lose themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have nobody to share their feelings.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
means the occupants are not able to have a chance to receive the advice from the elderly. Senior citizens have a life of experience and wisdom to guide their offspring to overcome any obstacles;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will be a lack for those who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
families.

However
, the greater outcomes from the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
units are undeniable. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can enjoy their privacy as they do not need to share rooms or personal items with others. The young marriage couples,
for example
, have more space to express their emotions without any interruptions. As the consequence, less conflict is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
among them.
What is more
, citizens in cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
cover all kinds of bills, and most of them are
incredibly
high;
therefore
, if they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
to support
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members, they
obviously
struggle with financial matters.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
that burden.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in cities cannot avoid the disadvantages which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
deal with when choosing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
solitarily
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
units, I believe this lifestyle is far more beneficial to the occupants.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than the large groups. Is it a positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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