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In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend? v.4

In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend? v. 4
Nowadays, many people claim that living alone or in small family units have gained popularity and outweighed living in large family groups. While I accept that there are some benefits and drawbacks of this decision, I would agree that it is better to live in an extended family. On the one hand, there are some benefits to living alone or in nuclear family units rather than in large family groups. Firstly, it is an apparent fact that living alone or in a nuclear household helps people to decrease financial pressure from living costs such as accommodation, food, and other bills. A most example of this is according to a survey in the Ho Chi Minh city, the expenditure on basic needs of nuclear families was 15 % lower than that in extended households. Another advantage could be that living alone or in small families provides for people to have much private space. This helps people avoid family conflicts between grandparents and children. As a result, family relationships are maintained. On the other hand, it seems to me that people should not live alone or in small households. The main shortcoming is that living alone or in nuclear households makes people lack support from grandparents. This is mean that parents devote more time and energy to take care of children. As a result, they suffer from stress-related health problems. Another disadvantage is the lack of experience from grandparents. This makes them have difficult problems solving real situations in life. For instance, in Viet Nam, there are 65 % of citizens living alone admit that they fail to solve difficult situations in society. Moreover, living alone also makes people reduce the likelihood of communication between family members. In conclusion, I believe that there are many minus points for living alone or in small family units, although this decision has some notable upsides.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
units have gained popularity and outweighed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
groups. While I accept that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits and drawbacks of this decision, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in an extended family.

On the one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
units
rather
than in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
groups.
Firstly
, it is an apparent fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in a nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
household
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to decrease financial pressure from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
costs such as accommodation, food, and other bills. A most example of this is according to a survey in the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Ho Chi Minh city
, the expenditure on basic needs of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
was 15 % lower than that in extended
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
households
. Another advantage could be that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
provides for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have much private space. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
avoid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
conflicts between grandparents and children.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
relationships
are maintained
.

On the other hand
, it seems to me that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
households
. The main shortcoming is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
households
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lack support from grandparents. This is mean that parents devote more time and energy to take care of children.
As a result
, they suffer from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-related health problems. Another disadvantage is the lack of experience from grandparents. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them have difficult problems solving real situations in life.
For instance
, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Viet
Nam, there are 65 % of citizens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
admit that they fail to solve difficult situations in society.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the likelihood of communication between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members.

In conclusion
, I believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
minus points for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
or in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
units, although this decision has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
notable upsides.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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