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In many countries there are an increasing number of private cars what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v.2

In many countries there are an increasing number of private cars what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 2
Nowadays, The number of cars have increased at an unprecedented rate. many people think that, it is most beneficial to have an own car. However, there are both pros and cons to deciding to this. In this essay, I will discuss some of the reasons why the use of private car is increase and some of the challenges created by this. One of the main positives of having a car is, it is more convenient transport type. What I mean by this is that people go anywhere, where they would like to go. people who have its own car they would use it for many purposes at any time when they want. For instance, when we decide to go for family trip then we need not to book any public transport or other types of transportation or waiting for it. it can make you independent. having private car is so crucial when some unforseen emergency situation occurred. secondly, when most of the people purchase cars then it automatically increase the production of cars. it is very fruitful to create a job in automobile industries. Take an example of developed country, there are many jobs options are created in automobile industries and also having a car is a status symbol. Turning to the other side of the argument private car create more traffic congesion. To be more precise urban areas are full of cars in rush hour. Lets use city Mumbai as an example. The rate of accident is increase there just because of problem created by traffic. Another issue is that private cars increase air and noise pollution in urban area. In other word this vehicle emit dangerous gases, it affect the quality of air, Moreover the quality of air is deteriorating. And also people face respiratory related health issues such as asthma. All things considered, In todays modern era everyone want to have private vehicle, but it also have some disadvantages related to health. Personally, I believe that it is vital to having a own vehicle for people live' s and economic impact. However, we must know when and how much we use the car so that we can minimise the demerits.
Nowadays, The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
Did you mean "has"?
have
increased at an unprecedented rate.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, it is most beneficial to have an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
.
However
, there are both pros and cons to deciding to this. In this essay, I will discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
reasons why the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
and
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
challenges created by this.

One of the main positives of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is, it is more convenient transport type. What I mean by this is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go anywhere, where they would like to go.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
purposes at any time when they want.
For instance
, when we decide to go for family trip then we need not
Did you mean "book"?
to book
any public transport or other types of transportation or waiting for it. it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
you independent.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
crucial when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
unforseen
emergency situation occurred.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
, when most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
then it
automatically
Did you mean "increases"?
increase
the production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
fruitful to create a job in automobile industries. Take an example of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed country
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
jobs options
are created
in automobile industries and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is a status symbol.

Turning to the other side of the argument
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
create more traffic
Possible spelling mistake found.
congesion
. To be more precise urban areas are full of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
in rush hour.
Did you mean "Let's" (let's = let us; lets = 3rd person singular of 'let')?
Lets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
city Mumbai as an example. The rate of accident is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of problem created by traffic.

Another issue is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increase
air and noise pollution in urban area. In other word this vehicle emit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
gases, it
Did you mean "affects"?
affect
the quality of air,
Moreover
the quality of air is deteriorating. And
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face respiratory related health issues such as asthma.

All things considered, In
Possible spelling mistake found.
todays
modern era everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "wants", "wanted".
want
to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
vehicle,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
Did you mean "has"?
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages related to health.
Personally
, I believe that it is vital to
Did you mean "have"?
having
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
vehicle for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
live&
#039; s and economic impact.
However
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know when and how much we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we can
Possible spelling mistake. 'minimise' is British English.
minimise
the demerits.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Mistakes
Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay In many countries there are an increasing number of private cars what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend v. 2

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
363 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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