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In many countries around the world it is common for families to run their own business. some people think that keeping the business within the family is the best approach while other believe this could lead to problems. What is your opinion? v.1

In many countries around the world it is common for families to run their own business. some people think that keeping the business within the family is the best approach while other believe this could lead to problems. What is your opinion? v. 1
It is argued by some people that running family business can improve profitability, while others believe this can lead to conflict between family members and raised the negative outcomes. In my opinion, despite having many advantages in family run businesses, there are additionally some drawbacks on this measure. This essay will discuss some pros and cons of starting a family profession. First of all, it should be said that the most obvious advantage of the family-run business is the high level of commitment and loyalty of members who can open further opportunities for development and eventually continues success. For example, moving toward a common goal as a result of the sense of trust between family members, eventually can lead to the long-term stability of that specific profession. Furthermore, another clear benefit of the family-owned trade is strengthening financial capability due to less cost and expenditures. To exemplify, the extra expenditures in order to training qualified employees can be ignored when all the members have the same background and common version of their career purpose. On the other hand, some drawbacks and challenges will come in the way of family professional growth, which can influence the advantages. In the initial place, over flexibility in time schedule due to emotional ties, can raise disruptive outputs. For instance, delegating responsibility to the other colleagues during the work time because of an unstructured leadership is very prevalent in family-run careers. Besides, having the same culture and background, increase the danger of group thinking for the companies, which not only is not a positive feature, but also can be resulted in the same ideas and proposals by narrowing the viewing angle. In conclusion, family businesses as similar to any other profession, have both positive and negative aspects and depends on the situation, can be profitable or harmful. Generally, in my perspective, while it should be decided by considering various aspects, the advantages of family-run trade overweight its disadvantages.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that running
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
profitability, while others believe this can lead to conflict between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
and raised the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcomes. In my opinion, despite having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
run
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
, there are
additionally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks on this measure. This essay will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pros and cons of starting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
profession.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it should
be said
that the most obvious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
of the family-run
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
is the high level of commitment and loyalty of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
who can open
further
opportunities for development and
eventually
continues success.
For example
, moving toward a common goal
as a result
of the sense of trust between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
,
eventually
can lead to the long-term stability of that specific profession.
Furthermore
, another
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
benefit of the family-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
trade is strengthening financial capability due to less cost and expenditures. To exemplify, the extra expenditures in order to training qualified employees can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
when all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
have the same background and common version of their career purpose.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks and challenges will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
professional growth, which can influence the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
. In the initial place, over flexibility in time schedule due to emotional ties, can raise disruptive outputs.
For instance
, delegating responsibility to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
colleagues during the work time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of an unstructured leadership is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
prevalent in family-run careers.
Besides
, having the same culture and background, increase the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of group thinking for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is not a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
feature,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can
be resulted
in the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and proposals by narrowing the viewing angle.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
as similar to any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
profession, have both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects and depends on the situation, can be profitable or harmful.
Generally
, in my perspective, while it should
be decided
by considering various aspects, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
of family-run trade overweight its disadvantages.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay In many countries around the world it is common for families to run their own business. some people think that keeping the business within the family is the best approach while other believe this could lead to problems. What is your opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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