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In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.15

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. v. 15
Countries has different policies on wages. This essay will discuss on point of view about the high earnings of some people, and whether or the government should allow a limit on the salaries received. One should be paid fairly. In my opinion salaries should depend on the performance and length of service of an employee. It is, because if one works harder and longer than the other and still is not compensated right, then they will tend to look for a better choice where there is proper and appropriate income source. So, pay the employees correctly according to their quality of work and loyalty. With regards to the government limiting the salaries, I think they should not take into consideration. In my point of view, there is no reason for them to set those limits, since this will not bring the economy down, instead it will help these people to be stable and have a better living. In my own experienced, I had worked so hard even doing overtime to really do my job well. At first, I received the minimum wage and so I got to do some other part-time jobs in order to pay bills, because on the job is not enough to cover it. Imagine being paid with the same amount your whole life, then I might not be able to be stable and be poor my whole life. I believe that a worker must be compensated fairly. In conclusion, many countries compensated differently. This essay had discussed the opinion on the regarding the high-income earning workers and the government agenda to limit the wages. In my opinion, it does not matter what work one had as long as it is compensated accordingly.
Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "country has".
Countries has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
policies on wages. This essay will discuss on point of view about the high earnings of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, and whether or the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
a limit on the salaries received.

One should
be paid
fairly
. In my opinion salaries should depend on the performance and length of service of an employee. It is,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if one works harder and longer than the other and
still
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
compensated
right, then they will tend to look for a better choice where there is proper and appropriate income source.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, pay the employees
correctly
according to their quality of work and loyalty.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
limiting the salaries, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they should not take into consideration. In my point of view, there is no reason for them to set those limits, since this will not bring the economy down,
instead
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to be stable and have a better living. In my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experienced, I had worked
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
even doing overtime to
really
do my job well. At
first
, I received the minimum
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
wage and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other part-time jobs in order to pay bills,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
on the job is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to cover it. Imagine
being paid
with the same amount your whole life, then I might not be able to be stable and be poor my whole life. I believe that a worker
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
compensated
fairly
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
compensated
differently
. This essay had discussed the opinion on the regarding the high-income earning workers and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
agenda to limit the wages. In my opinion, it does not matter what work one had as long as it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
compensated
accordingly
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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