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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. v.1

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 1
As nations build rapid rail networks connecting their cities, some people argue the money should rather be spent on improving existing public transportation systems. While there are merits in both the arguments, tight budget allocation for infrastructure projects compels many nations to choose either of them. One prime reason behind constructing fast train networks is to avoid overcrowding of cities. Consequently, this enables people to live comfortably in their hometown, in their own house, along with their family; and take the train to cities for their work every day, spending the least amount of time travelling. Furthermore, this arrangement boosts the rural economy and enhances the mental wellbeing of citizens by keeping families together. Thanks to its mass transportation network, Singapore is a phenomenal example where the masses do not need to live in rented houses closer to cities, but rather in their own homes far away. On the contrary, being mammoth and long-running, fast train network projects deny time and funding to maintain existing public transportation systems. As the majority of a nation’s citizens rely on existing public transport systems for their travelling needs, it is of paramount importance to maintain and constantly upgrade them. Sri Lanka is a prime example of how futuristic, ambitious bullet train projects have ended up crippling the maintenance of the present transportation systems, as the island nation’s government grapples for funding, having spent all the fortune on its ambitious projects. I strongly believe, while acknowledging the merits of both the arguments, the foremost importance should be given to keep the existing roads and rail networks in working conditions, as they keep the wheels of the economy moving; nevertheless, additional funding should be sought to launch futuristic transportation projects. Securing whatever it already has, a nation can then confidently take bolder steps into the future.
As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
build rapid rail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
connecting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue the money should
rather
be spent
on improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
. While there are merits in both the arguments, tight budget allocation for infrastructure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
compels
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to choose either of them.

One prime reason behind constructing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
is to avoid overcrowding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Consequently
, this enables
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
comfortably
in their hometown, in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, along with their family; and take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
for their work every day, spending the least amount of time travelling.
Furthermore
, this arrangement boosts the rural economy and enhances the mental
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
of citizens by keeping families together. Thanks to its mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
, Singapore is a phenomenal example where the masses do not need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in rented
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
closer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
rather
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
homes far away.

On the contrary
, being mammoth and long-running,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
deny time and funding to maintain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
. As the majority of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation’s
citizens rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
public transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
for their travelling needs, it is of paramount importance to maintain and
constantly
upgrade them. Sri Lanka is a prime example of how futuristic, ambitious bullet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
have ended up crippling the maintenance of the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
, as the island
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
grapples for funding, having spent all the fortune on its ambitious projects.

I
strongly
believe, while acknowledging the merits of both the arguments, the foremost importance should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
roads and rail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
in working conditions, as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the wheels of the economy moving;
nevertheless
, additional funding should
be sought
to launch futuristic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
. Securing whatever it already has, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
can then
confidently
take bolder steps into the future.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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