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Fast food advertisement can be found on TV and throughout social media which tempts people to eat unhealthy food. Should fast food adds be banned?

Fast food advertisement can be found on TV and throughout social media which tempts people to eat unhealthy food. Should fast food adds be banned?

essayopinionFast FoodHealth
Writing Structure
Advertisement about low-nutritional-level food can be seen on a daily basics through different sources such as television and the internet. There are some people who believe this can contribute to consume that type of nutrition, thus, it is imperative to penalize this type of adds. This essay will give examples from the Federal Department of Food and Nutrition of the USA and the American Association of marketing to demonstrate point and support arguments. It is well known that, most of the unhealthy food such as hamburgers, pizza, and sodas, increase the risk of heart disease, strokes and a great variety of cancers. Evidence of this statement can be seen in recent study by the Federal Department of Food and Nutrition of the USA that showed a sharp increase in the number of heart attacks in individuals who eat fast food 2 or 3 times per week compared to sporadic consumers. Therefore, it is clear the negative impact this type of diet can have on people health. Despite the toxic repercussion of this diet, individuals are purchasing unhealthy food more than past times, this reality can be as a result of the constant marketing promoting this type of intake, not only on TV but also in social media such as Facebook. A recent study by the American Association of marketing showed that, on average, an American is exposed to junk food adds 10 times more compared to previous decade. The same study demonstrated that companies such as Mac Donalds, also increase their sales 10 times during the same period. In conclusion, from the arguments and examples given, I firmly believe that advertisement about unhealthy meals should be regulated and limited by the government as it is clear that people are tempted to consume this type of nutriments when being exposed to it
Introduction
Background Information

Unclassified Sentences

Thesis Statement

Body Paragraph 1
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Concluding Sentence

Body Paragraph 2
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Conclusion
Restatement of Thesis

Overall Band Score: 5.5
Task Achievement
6
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear opinion, but the arguments could be more developed and supported with additional evidence.
Lexical Resource
5
The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and repetitive. There are instances of awkward phrasing and incorrect word forms.
Coherence & Cohesion
5.5
The essay presents a logical structure but lacks clear transitions between ideas. Some sentences are convoluted, making it difficult to follow the argument.
Grammatical Range
5
There are several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb forms and punctuation issues. The sentence structures are mostly simple and lack complexity.

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