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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.25

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing transport. v. 25
Transportation is a means of moving humans from one place to another. In order to improve the means of transporting people and goods, some people believe that it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains, while others believe that the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. I would like to discuss the two views mentioned above as well as gives my opinion on both positions. Firstly, every government should spend large sums of money on building new railway lines for speedy trains because the modern ideology favours fast delivery. The advent and improvement in technology has affected the time needed to complete tasks and this has also affected human thinking so much that they expect everything to be done in a speedy manner. For example, in communication, online mails are delivered within seconds, as opposed to the earlier days of sending letters by post, which might take months to deliver. Thus, it is expedient to spend huge amount of money to build railway lines for very fast trains between cities. One of the results of this is improvement in trade and investment. However, government revenues should be spent on improving current public transport where a lot of capital has been used in developing them. Even though fast trains are important, it is not a wise decision to allocate funds to another project with the aim of abandoning the current project. For instance, the Lagos State Government in Nigeria has spent over $30 billion of taxpayers' money on constructing alternative route to ease traffic congestion, which is a major setback to its economy, therefore, it would be a bad decision to abandon the existing project for an entirely new one. The result is that, the Citizens would need to wait for a very long period for the new project to be concluded, thus it is advisable to improve the existing means of public transportation. So, in my view, I would advise the government officials to consider improving the existing means of transportation rather investing public funds in an entirely new one, even though the new project's advantages could be overwhelming. In other words, the government can spend large sums of money on the two projects, where there are enough funds to finance both projects.
Transportation is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of moving humans from one place to another. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transporting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that it is necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
large sums of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway lines for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
, while others believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
should
be spent
on improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport. I would like to discuss the two views mentioned above
as well
as gives my opinion on both positions.

Firstly
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
large sums of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
railway lines for speedy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the modern ideology
Possible spelling mistake. 'favours' is British English.
favours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
delivery. The advent and improvement in technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the time needed to complete tasks and this has
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
human thinking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
everything to
be done
Consider replacing "in a speedy manner" with the adverb for "speedy"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a speedy manner
.
For example
, in communication, online mails
are delivered
within seconds, as opposed to the earlier days of sending letters by post, which might take months to deliver.
Thus
, it is expedient to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
huge amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to build railway lines for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
between cities. One of the results of this is improvement in trade and investment.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
revenues should
be spent
on improving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
capital has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in developing them.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, it is not a wise decision to allocate funds to another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
with the aim of abandoning the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
.
For instance
, the Lagos State
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
in Nigeria has spent over $30 billion of taxpayers'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on constructing alternative route to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
traffic congestion, which is a major setback to its economy,
therefore
, it would be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
decision to abandon the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
for an
entirely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
one. The result is that, the Citizens would need to wait for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
long period for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
to
be concluded
,
thus
it is advisable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my view, I would advise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
officials to consider improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
means
of transportation
rather
investing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
funds in an
entirely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
one,
even though
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
project's advantages could be overwhelming.
In other words
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
large sums of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on the two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
, where there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
funds to finance both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing transport. v. 25

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
386 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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