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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v.22

In many countries, some people are in favor of the construction of railroad tracks while other persons point of view is that to invest the amount of money on improving community transportation. I would argue that it is better to improve public transportation. The opinion of the creation of railway tracks is attractive for several reasons. The huge number of transports on the roads are not environmentally friendly; they emit carbon dioxide gases, which is harmful to the environment. In terms of the huge amount of traffic on the roads create traffic jams and people get with accidents due to the urgency of reach to work early. In this way, railways are fruitful in order to cater to all these issues which are mentioned before. On the other hand, I believe that it is more beneficial to reconstruct transport for public use. Firstly, railways are good for long-routes, but it is not good for short-routes. If people have to go near then they mostly prefer local transport instead of rails. Secondly, public transport interconnects all parts of the cities which are not possible by train because the train only connects between cities but not inside cities and people who need to travel inter-city for their workplaces and institutions, then public transport is used more. For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that for general public transport between cities is more demanding, although there are many positive points of railways.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are in favor of the construction of railroad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
while other persons point of view is that to invest the amount of money on improving community transportation. I would argue that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation.

The opinion of the creation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
is attractive for several reasons. The huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
on the roads are not
environmentally
friendly; they emit carbon dioxide gases, which is harmful to the environment. In terms of the huge amount of traffic on the roads create traffic jams and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
with accidents due to the urgency of reach to work early. In this way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are fruitful in order to cater to all these issues which
are mentioned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.

On the other hand
, I believe that it is more beneficial to reconstruct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
Firstly
,
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railways
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for long-routes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for short-routes. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go near then they
mostly
prefer local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
instead
of rails.
Secondly
,
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public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
interconnects all parts of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
which are not possible by train
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because
the train
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
connects between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not inside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who need to travel inter-city for their workplaces and institutions, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
more.

For the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that for general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is more demanding, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
points of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
.
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IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it’s necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
241 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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