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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v.19

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 19
For many people around the world, the preferred method of transportation is high-speed rail. Commuters travelling to and from work rely on the safety and efficiency, while tourists appreciate the convenience and novelty that trains provide. Others believe that highways, buses and regular trains should be improved before new, high-speed lines are added. Safety is chief among concerns for those who travel to work or school on a regular basis. If one drives a car, they have to concentrate on the road not only to avoid accidents but also to prevent other drivers from causing a problem on the road. High-speed rail allows the commuters to leave the driving to the professional controlling the train, allowing them to get some work done while getting to work safely. In addition, people tend to move further and further away from city centres, where land and houses are more affordable. High-speed rail allows these commuters to travel greater distances in a shorter amount of time. There is a flow-on effect here, because if we can reduce the number of cars on the road, we can also cut down on traffic jams and road delays. On the other hand, high-speed trains are expensive, and some believe this money could be spent on repairing motorways which are used by cars, buses and motorcycles. Another possibility would be to use this money to build more regular commuter trains and buses to service the ever-expanding urban populations. Moreover, boats and ferries could benefit from a budget, which focuses more on existing forms of transport. In the end, public transport is an issue which affects us all. The taxes which we pay should be spent on the type of transport, which will have the most benefit to all citizens. In addition, we need to take into account how much the environment is damaged by fossil fuels and pollution. Therefore, I believe in order to move forward, we need to embrace the idea of high-speed rail, so that future generations can continue to live safely and efficiently.
For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around the world, the preferred method of transportation is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high-speed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Commuters
travelling to and from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
rely on the safety and efficiency, while tourists appreciate the convenience and novelty that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
provide. Others believe that highways, buses and regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
new,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high-speed
lines are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
.

Safety is chief among concerns for those who travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or school on a regular basis. If one drives a car, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
concentrate on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to avoid accidents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
other drivers from causing a problem on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
High-speed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the driving to the professional controlling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
, allowing them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
done while getting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
safely
.

In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
further
and
further
away from city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
, where land and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are more affordable.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
High-speed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
to travel greater distances in a shorter amount of time. There is a flow-on effect here,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of cars on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, we can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down on traffic jams and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
delays.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high-speed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
are expensive, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe this money could
be spent
on repairing motorways which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by cars, buses and motorcycles.
Another possibility
would be to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this money to build more regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and buses to service the ever-expanding urban populations.
Moreover
, boats and ferries could benefit from a budget, which focuses more on existing forms of transport.

In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, public transport is an issue which affects us all. The taxes which we pay should
be spent
on the type of transport, which will have the most benefit to all citizens.
In addition
, we need to take into account how much the environment
is damaged
by fossil fuels and pollution.
Therefore
, I believe in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
forward, we need to embrace the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high-speed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that future generations can continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
safely
and
efficiently
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 19

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
338 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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