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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v.16

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 16
People, in some countries, prefer to have a fast and extensive rail communication while others think that improving the existing road transportation system is far more important and that is why the more budget should be spent on roads. This essay discusses both views and includes my opinion before drawing a reasonable conclusion. On the one hand, people in favour of having a speedy and reliable train transmission process mainly base their ground on the fact that trains can carry a great number of passengers and goods at a time and can remarkably reduce the traffic congestion. Rail communication is safer, faster and can connect cities and towns that build a better communication system than the conventional road transport system, according to these people. Furthermore, locomotives are already famous in many countries and have greatly improved communications there. Due to such advantages, people often opine that more money should be allocated for constructing new train lines. For instance, train system in China has a groundbreaking contribution to improving its overall communication system and many countries have started adopting this model. On the other hand, public transport system plays an essential role for interconnecting the different parts of the cities and the highest percentage of people use this system to travel to different places. Though trains can improve the city transport facilities, it is not an alternative to the existing road transports. That is why many people believe that national budget should be utilised on improving the public transport for the sake of the better communication for mass people. For instance, train line in the UK has always contributed to a great extent to the overall transport system in the country. Nevertheless, the public transport has always been the main commuting mode for the UK citizens. To conclude, I personally believe that, the national budget should be fairly distributed both for the improvement of the rail and public transports for the overall expansion and improvement of the transportation system.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, prefer to have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and extensive rail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that improving the existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
is far more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and
that is
why the more budget should
be spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
. This essay discusses both views and includes my opinion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
drawing a reasonable conclusion.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of having a speedy and reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
transmission process
mainly
base their ground on the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
can carry a great number of passengers and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
at a time and can
remarkably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the traffic congestion. Rail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
is safer, faster and can connect cities and towns that build a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
than the conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
, according to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Furthermore
, locomotives are already
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and have
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
communications there. Due to such advantages,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
opine that more money should
be allocated
for constructing new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
lines.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
in China has a groundbreaking contribution to improving its
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
adopting this model.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
plays an essential role for interconnecting the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the cities and the highest percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
to travel to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places. Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
facilities, it is not an alternative to the existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
.
That is
why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that national budget should be
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilised' is British English.
utilised
on improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
for the sake of the better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
for mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
line in the UK has always contributed to a great extent to the
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Nevertheless
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
has always been the main commuting mode for the UK citizens.

To conclude
, I
personally
believe that, the national budget should be
fairly
distributed both for the improvement of the rail and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
for the
overall
expansion and improvement of the transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 16

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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