Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.14

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 14
Public transports such as trains, buses and trams are travel alternatives for those who are going to their workplace, studying at schools or looking to go for a vacation. Many consider that building intercity railways for rapid trains are rather essential though it involves a massive fund to do so; while others regard that improvising the present public transport is more worthwhile. I am more inclined to support the latter as making new railways will be less costly and time consuming for those who need to travel between cities. First of all, most people will opt for public trains if it is cheaper compared to driving a car or faster than taking a bus. In other words, building new train lines will attract new passengers who previously had to rely on cars or buses to take public trains instead. This is because a car owner is required to pay for expensive fuel and car maintenance while one would only need to purchase a train ticket which will likely be cheaper. Take the example of the MRT system in Singapore: many Singaporean citizens do not own a car for personal use as it is less costly to use the train. Thus, constructing new railways will help citizens to save on their expenditure in the long term. On the other hand, improving the present public transport involves less capital and will interest those who previously had a bad impression of using public transports. This can be done if the government does repairs, upgrades, renovations on the vehicles and the stations. For instance, UK governments have upgraded single decker buses to double decker ones; consequently, this has draw the attention of passengers who previously dreaded waiting at bus stations as double decker buses are able to transport more passangers at once. Therefore, it will be wise for the government to make its current public transports so as to boost its popularity among people who were at an inconvenience to use them. In a nutshell, the essay has discussed the reasons to support constructions of new railways for trains that travel very fast including influencing more people to become train users as it will be less costly. In addition, the essay also stated that upgrading existing transports will urge previous customers to try using them again. In my perspective, new railways will be better as it it will save time and money for the users in the long term.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
, buses and trams are travel alternatives for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are going to their workplace, studying at schools or looking to go for a vacation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
consider that building intercity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
for rapid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
are
rather
essential though it involves a massive fund to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
; while others regard that improvising the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
is more worthwhile. I am more inclined to support the latter as making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
costly and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
need to travel between cities.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will opt for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
if it is cheaper compared to driving a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
or faster than taking a bus.
In other words
, building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
lines will attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
passengers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
previously had to rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
or buses to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
instead
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
owner
is required
to pay for expensive fuel and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
maintenance while one would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
ticket which will likely be cheaper. Take the example of the MRT system in Singapore:
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Singaporean citizens do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
for personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
as it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
costly to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
.
Thus
, constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
citizens to save on their expenditure in the long term.

On the other hand
, improving the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
involves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
capital and will interest those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
previously had a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
impression of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
. This can
be done
if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
does repairs, upgrades, renovations on the vehicles and the stations.
For instance
, UK
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have upgraded single
Possible spelling mistake found.
decker
buses to
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
double decker
ones;
consequently
, this has
Use past participle here: "drawn".
draw
the attention of passengers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
previously dreaded waiting at bus stations as
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
double decker
buses are able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
passangers
at once.
Therefore
, it will be wise for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
boost its popularity among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
were at an inconvenience to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them.

In a nutshell, the essay has discussed the reasons to support constructions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
that travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
including influencing more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
users as it will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
costly.
In addition
, the essay
also
stated that upgrading existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transports
will urge previous customers to try using them again.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
my perspective,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
will be better
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
It seems you either mean "it is", "if it", "it" or there is a comma missing: "it, it".
it it
will save time and money for the users in the long term.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
49Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes
Do you know what a foreign accent is? It’s a sign of bravery.
Amy Chua

IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
405 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts