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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

essaydiscussionHigh Speed RailPublic Transport
Writing Structure
Some people believe that, countries should spend money to escalate transportation system such as railway which can escalate their economics. However, others are claiming that public trasports play much more important role. I believe the money should be spent on public transportation because it has greater effect on people's daily lives. On one hand, investing on fast trains can be the key to affordable travelling between countries. This is mainly because at such low price, lower than the flight tickets, it provides plenty of features. Spending money on railway would increase the number of travels in 1 year. Local economies will benefit from people, injecting vast sums of money into travelling. However I think that the government would spend a lack amount of money in advance of the railway system, which is considered as a risk to a government since it is not going to be profitable. On the other hand, public transport that already exists has much more impact on individuals. Considering the fact that public trasports are used daily, it has become a crucial part of daily lives. Logically, investing a significant amount of money on public trasportation would deal with various issues such as delays and overcrowding. Additionally, government would make a dramatical profit out of it since the public trasportation is much cheaper than high-speed trains. Therefore, I admit that improving public trasportation system is valuable. In conclusion, despite the railway system being important for traveling through countries, the government is not going to handle the money spent on it. Because of this fact, investing cash on daily trasportation is considered more functional.
Introduction
Unclassified Sentences

Unclassified Sentences

Thesis Statement

Body Paragraph 1
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Concluding Sentence

Body Paragraph 2
Topic Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Supporting Sentence

Concluding Sentence

Conclusion
Restatement of Thesis

Final Thought

Overall Band Score: 5.5
Task Achievement
6
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views and providing a personal opinion. However, the arguments could be developed further with more supporting details.
Lexical Resource
5
The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and contains several spelling errors. There is a lack of variety in word choice, which affects the overall quality.
Coherence & Cohesion
5.5
The essay presents a clear argument but lacks smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Some sentences are disjointed, affecting the overall flow.
Grammatical Range
5
The essay contains several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb forms and sentence structures. There is limited use of complex sentences.

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