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In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 1
Due to rapid urbanization, better means of travelling have become a major concern. On one hand, some people argue that spending heavy budgets on building fast railway infrastructures between cities is necessary; on the other hand, many people believe that the budget should be spent on improving the existing public transportation. This essay will discuss both views and provide my opinion. People, in some countries, favour fast and reliable railway transportation system. The facts behind this favouritism are that the trains carry more passengers and goods at the same time and reduce traffic congestion. Besides, trains are safer and faster trains can connect cities to build a better communication system. For instance, Japan and China have successfully constructed fast railway tracks around the country due to which their transportation system has become extremely strong and fast. Due to the above-mentioned facts, some people believe that a large amount of budget should be spent on a fast railway system between cities. However, many people think that budget money should be utilized to improve existing public transportation. Public transport systems play a crucial role in interconnecting the different parts of the cities. In addition, due to the increase in population, cities are constantly growing, and people tend to move further away from the city centre's, where the houses are big and affordable. A good public transportation system may help these people to commute easily within the city. For example, despite the fact that London is one of the busiest cities in the world, the underground railway system has made the commuting within the city more reliable and quick. Therefore, many people argue that the money should be spent on improving existing public transportation. To conclude, according to the needs, different people have different preferences around the world. While some people think that the government should be more focused on fast-moving trains between the cities, many people argue that the budget should be used to improve the existing transportation system. Moreover, in my opinion, the national budget should be fairly distributed for both railways and other means of transportation for the overall improvement of a country’s transportation system.
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Due
to rapid urbanization, better means of travelling have become a major concern. On one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that spending heavy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budgets
on building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
infrastructures between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is necessary;
on the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budget
should
be spent
on improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. This essay will discuss both views and provide my opinion.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries,
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
and reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. The facts behind this
Possible spelling mistake found.
favouritism
are that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
carry more passengers and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
at the same time and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
traffic congestion.
Besides
,
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trains
are safer and faster
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trains
can connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
to build a better communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
For instance
, Japan and China have
successfully
constructed
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
around the country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to which their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
has become
extremely
strong and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Due
to the above-mentioned facts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that a large amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budget
should
be spent
on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
between cities.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budget
money should
be utilized
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Public
transport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
play a crucial role in interconnecting the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the increase in population,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are
constantly
growing, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
further
away from the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
's, where the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
and affordable. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to commute
easily
within the city.
For example
, despite the fact that London is one of the busiest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in the world, the underground
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
has made the commuting within the city more reliable and quick.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that the money should
be spent
on improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation.

To conclude
, according to the needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
preferences around the world. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be more focused on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budget
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
Moreover
, in my opinion, the national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
budget
should be
fairly
distributed for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and other means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
for the
overall
improvement of a country’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
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IELTS essay In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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