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If you could visit any foreign country in the world for two weeks, all expenses paid, which country would it be and why? v.1

If you could visit any foreign country in the world for two weeks, all expenses paid, which country would it be and why? v. 1
There are many people who have called into question the lack of recycling in the world. While I think, to a certain, extent governments should enforce reprocessing laws on households, I also believe that the education about reusable materials is more crucial. It is undeniable that recycling programs require co-operation from the public and this cannot be achieved without enhancements comprehension. The administrations should therefore inculcate people about the benefits involved, as well as how to sort trash into different bins. For trying to change the person’s mentality from a young age, children have to work in this field to learn the significance of reusing materials. Furthermore, education from early times, has a vast role in individual Habits which contains our lifestyle. For instant, In Scandinavian countries, teachers educate children while working with them in the natural environment. Many researchers corroborates, recycling is emerging in these lands because of awareness. On the other hand, the Regulations should certainly exist to ensure individuals sort through their household refuse to separate reusable materials. Even when citizens know about the advantages of doing this, However do not fear punishment and not participate in it, there are more likely to produce added waste. As a precaution, if residents face penalties for neglecting environmental, protection rules, they would be more likely to take the extra few minutes, to place plastics, papers in proper bins rather that waste them. For example, in Singapore rates of recycling is the highest because of their substantial fines compare to the other part of the world. In conclusion, as exploiting waste through different salvaging processes protect the environment, governments should make it a legal punishment for people who are reluctant to do their part. Nevertheless, concurrent to implementing these laws, administrations should educate citizens about this process.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have called into question the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
in the world. While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, to a certain, extent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should enforce reprocessing laws on households, I
also
believe that the education about reusable materials is more crucial.

It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
programs require co-operation from the public and this cannot
be achieved
without enhancements comprehension. The administrations should
therefore
inculcate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about the benefits involved,
as well
as how to sort trash into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
bins. For trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the person’s mentality from a young age, children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work in this field to learn the significance of reusing materials.
Furthermore
, education from early times, has a vast role in individual

Habits which contains our lifestyle. For instant, In Scandinavian countries, teachers educate children while working with them in the natural environment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
researchers
You should probably use "corroborate".
corroborates
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
is emerging in these lands
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of awareness.

On the other hand
, the Regulations should
certainly
exist to ensure individuals sort through their household refuse to separate reusable materials. Even when citizens know about the advantages of doing this,
However
do not fear punishment and not participate in it, there are more likely to produce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
waste. As a precaution, if residents face penalties for neglecting environmental, protection
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
, they would be more likely to take the extra few minutes, to place plastics, papers in proper bins
rather
that waste them.
For example
, in Singapore rates of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
is the highest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their substantial fines compare to the other part of the world.

In conclusion
, as exploiting waste through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
salvaging processes protect the environment,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it a legal punishment for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are reluctant to do their part.
Nevertheless
, concurrent to implementing these laws, administrations should educate citizens about this process.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay If you could visit any foreign country in the world for two weeks, all expenses paid, which country would it be and why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
297 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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