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how do you like to communicate with people: through face to face communication or through letters or phones? v.1

how do you like to communicate with people: through face to face communication or through letters or phones? v. 1
Searching for new means of oil and gas in inaccessible areas is essential because the requirement of these resources is significantly growing. I believe that the merits of this including shortage and prices of these resources can be improved outweigh the demerit such as they would exhaust swiftly. To begin with, fossil fuels should be searched in remote areas because this helps to improve the scarcity of these resources. This means that many countries face arduousness circumstances when they have fewer sources of fossil fuels and they can ameliorate this problem if looking for new areas in their country to find these resources. This will not only beneficial to cover their demand for these resources, but also they can export to other nations which could be supportive to curb inadequate concern. Another principal advantage of this is that the prices of oil and gas could be reduced. Natural resources are going to extinct in the future and utilization of these is also at a peak, which impacts on their prices and eventually, prices are high in some countries. This indicates that the prices of fossil fuels and production are inversely proportional. For example, in India, the price of petrol is a hundred rupees per litre and this country needs to import this resource from other countries which increases its price. So they trying to find out the new source in their country and price could be decreased. Despite these pros, there is a major disadvantage is with exploiting remote and untouched locations. This means that these striking landscapes would potentially jeopardize. For instance, an area which countries would like to drill is the Antarctic, home to many glaciers and animals such as polar bears and penguins. Drilling here would harm the habitat, and in particular, any spillages would be disastrous to the environment. In conclusion, although there is a chief disadvantage of finding new places to get oil and gas is that new found places would damage its surroundings, they would be helpful to fulfil requirements and cut down prices.
Searching for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
means of oil and gas in inaccessible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
is essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the requirement of these resources is
significantly
growing. I believe that the merits of this including shortage and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of these resources can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
outweigh the demerit such as they would exhaust
swiftly
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, fossil fuels should
be searched
in remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the scarcity of these resources. This means that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
face arduousness circumstances when they have fewer sources of fossil
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
fuels and
they can ameliorate this problem if looking for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to find these resources. This will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
beneficial to cover their demand for these resources,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they can export to other nations which could be supportive to curb inadequate concern.

Another principal advantage of this is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of oil and gas could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. Natural resources are going to extinct in the future and utilization of these is
also
at a peak, which impacts on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
and
eventually
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
are high in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This indicates that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of fossil fuels and production are
inversely
proportional.
For example
, in India, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of petrol is a hundred rupees per
Possible spelling mistake. 'litre' is British English.
litre
and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
needs to import this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
resource
from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which increases its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
Did you mean "they're trying", "they are trying", or "they were trying"?
they trying
to find out the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
source in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
could
be decreased
.

Despite these pros, there is a major disadvantage is with exploiting remote and untouched locations. This means that these striking landscapes would
potentially
jeopardize.
For instance
, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
would like to drill is the Antarctic, home to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
glaciers and animals such as polar bears and penguins. Drilling here would harm the habitat, and
in particular
, any spillages would be disastrous to the environment.

In conclusion
, although there is a chief disadvantage of finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
places to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
oil and gas is that
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
new found
places would damage its surroundings, they would be helpful to fulfil requirements and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay how do you like to communicate with people: through face to face communication or through letters or phones? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
340 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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