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he chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. v.1

he chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. v. 1
In this digital age and era, shopping-online has become a trend. People are purchasing books, groceries, tickets, and any other required day-to-day items from the web. I agree that this trend has more positives than negatives and shall discuss the same further in this essay. First of all, offline purchasing (from local markets) needs a lot of time and energy, also it is not practically possible to find a huge variety of products at a single place, so one needs to go from one market to another. Moreover, these days, everyone is running out of time because of their busy and hectic work schedule, nobody got time to go physically to a store in order to buy something. For instance, a recent study published in The Times newspaper shows that 83% of the supermarket customers don't like wasting their precious time shopping every day. Because of that, there is a huge spike in the number of online purchasers, also online vendors provide huge discounts on different credit/debit cards. This way, they can easily find an enormous variety of products on a single website or app. For instance, Amazon is an online retailer, and it has got millions of different products. As a result, one can buy books, groceries or even live plants on a single platform. Thus, more and more people are shopping online these days. In conclusion, I opine that the benefits of online shopping outweigh its drawbacks. It can save a lot of time, also very cheap as compared to traditional buying from stores. In the future, the web-based purchasing industry will boom.
In this digital age and era, shopping-online has become a trend.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are purchasing books, groceries, tickets, and any other required day-to-day items from the web. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that this trend has more positives than negatives and shall discuss the same
further
in this essay.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, offline purchasing (from local markets) needs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy,
also
it is not
practically
possible to find a huge variety of products at a single place,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
one needs to go from one market to another.
Moreover
, these days, everyone is running out of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their busy and hectic work schedule, nobody
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to go
physically
to a store in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
something.
For instance
, a recent study published in The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Times
newspaper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 83% of the supermarket customers don't like wasting their precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
shopping every day.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of that, there is a huge spike in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
purchasers,
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
vendors provide huge discounts on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
credit/debit cards. This way, they can
easily
find an enormous variety of products on a single website or app.
For instance
, Amazon is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
retailer, and it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
millions of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
products.
As a result
, one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
books, groceries or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
plants on a single platform.
Thus
, more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
these days.

In conclusion
, I opine that the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping outweigh its drawbacks. It can save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
as compared to traditional buying from stores. In the future, the web-based purchasing industry will boom.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay he chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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