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Government should spend more money on railways than roads. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.3

Government should spend more money on railways than roads. with this statement? v. 3
Many years ago, the athlete’s goal was to set a new world record and to be the champion in the competition. Nowadays, the medal’s position is changing and becoming less powerful than in the past. Instead of that, a huge amount of money and the popularity seem to be things which the competitors pursue to. These may affect on the youth in both sides: negative and positive. . On the first hand, when wage plays the majority of purpose, not only the meaning of the sport would be transmuted, but the match would be unfair by other parties. Therefore, the players would think they have no need to show all their courage and efforts that the reason why many audiences feel some races are no longer attractive to them. It would be more pernicious in the case of existing some members of the event relating to gamble, which makes them betray against their comrades. For example, in a football match, if team A is the winner, they would get 50000 USD or 3000 - 4000 USD for each person. However, a participant would be paid 5000 - 6000 USD in condition team A gets loser. This is totally unfavourable to that team. On the other hand, the bonus the competitors got from the championships would help them to improve themselves and the famous could bring more opportunities to them. Many talented guys who grew up in underprivileged family, but enthuse in sport needs to think about his life and to earn more money before considering the guinness. Furthermore, cash would be the better choice for athletes when the expectation of the new record is unable to reach. In conclusion, there exist drawbacks in what influence on young people’s mind is made by payments and the fame of sportsmen, however, despite this negative side, attracting money in the sport industry leads to development.
Many
years ago, the athlete’s goal was to set a new world record and to be the champion in the competition. Nowadays, the medal’s position is changing and becoming less powerful than in the past.
Instead
of that, a huge amount of money and the popularity seem to be things which the competitors pursue to. These may
affect
on the youth in both sides:
negative
and
positive
.
.


On the
first
hand, when wage plays the majority of purpose, not
only
the meaning of the sport would
be transmuted
,
but
the match would be unfair by other parties.
Therefore
, the players would
think
they have no need to
show
all their courage and efforts that the reason why
many
audiences feel
some
races are no longer attractive to them. It would be more pernicious in the case of existing
some
members of the
event
relating to gamble, which
makes
them betray against their comrades.
For example
, in a football match, if team A is the winner, they would
get
50000 USD or
3000 - 4000
USD for each person.
However
, a participant would
be paid
5000 - 6000
USD in condition team A
gets
loser. This is
totally
unfavourable
to that team.

On the other hand
, the bonus the competitors
got
from the championships would
help
them to
improve
themselves and the
famous
could bring more opportunities to them.
Many
talented guys who grew up in underprivileged family,
but
enthuse in sport needs to
think
about his life and to earn more money
before
considering the
guinness
.
Furthermore
, cash would be the better choice for athletes when the expectation of the new record is unable to reach.

In conclusion
, there exist drawbacks in what influence on young
people
’s mind
is made
by payments and the fame of sportsmen,
however
, despite this
negative
side, attracting money in the sport industry leads to development.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Government should spend more money on railways than roads. with this statement? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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